We spent Christmas together with our kids and our son’s girlfriend and family. This is our third Christmas together. We missed 2020 due to COVID — or it would be number four. This year, we rented a VRBO between our home and the Bay Area (where everyone but us lives). The house was amazing and it was a wonderful few days with family. My daughter and I had a mother-daughter day while the rest went to Solvang. I absolutely loved our time alone together. We spent so much time together while she was growing up that it was taken for granted. Now it’s a huge gift.
The Christmas CrewOne of our musts in Santa Barbara for breakfast.Statue at the marina.Seawall at the marina where the ocean and seaweed splashes over the wall.Mother daughter selfie on our much needed day together.At the end of the seawall you can walk the plank to a small beach.Fish tacos from On the Alley in the Santa Barbara marina. The best. I’m trying to find something close in AZ.
All of my son’s girlfriend’s family play stringed instruments. Two of the seven are professional musicians and we enjoyed Christmas Eve, Christmas and post Christmas concerts in our living room. Below are two samples of the amazing music we were treated to.
Waiting for the kids to arrive during a California storm.
We arrived at our Christmas destination amidst a rain and wind storm. I’m so thankful that our day of driving was the day before the storm. We spent the night with friends close to our airbnb. I had anxiously awaited our kids and my son’s girlfriend’s family who drove from the Bay Area as all of California was engulfed in rain, wind and flooding
In the meantime, my husband and I trekked to Costco about 15 miles away from the airbnb. I’m a nervous nelly on freeways and with the rain, visibility was zero to three feet. I white knuckled it as a passenger and thought, “I’m only doing this for my kids.”
Once at Costco, we got drenched walking from the parking lot into the store — trying to cram both of us under one small umbrella. On the way home on the 101, the rain got even heavier if that’s possible. We watched in horror as the car in front of us tapped his brakes, spun out, then headlights moved towards us in our lane. Then he stopped, thankfully, made a U-turn across the three lanes and made his exit.
I was literally shaking. My husband slowed down and we crawled at 40 mph towards our exit, only to get a google warning on maps that there was a wreck right before our exit. We got off the 101 and took surface streets and safely, thankfully, arrived at the airbnb.
Our kids’ drives should have been five and a half hours, but turned into eight. The entire 101 freeway was closed due to flooding and boulders in the highway somewhere around San Luis Obsipo.
We stayed up waiting for them all to arrive. I knew I couldn’t sleep until everyone was accounted for. I gave big hugs to each carload that arrived. My daughter’s car arrived first, and finally my son’s last. Everyone was safely tucked into their beds. I finally got a good night’s sleep. This morning the sun is shining and we’re ready to celebrate the birth of our Savior.
Merry Christmas! Stay safe and enjoy your time with your loved ones.
Christmas 2019, our daughter and Waffles the Pug came to stay. This was a mere few months pre-COVID and a global pandemic was the furthest thing from my mind.
It was during a pre-COVID Christmas break that I learned something new about the park by our old home. It’s a great place to meet other dog owners. In fact, we found a group of little dog owners who gather at 4 p.m. and let their dogs play together. Waffles, who is not at all shy, was trying to take over the group and loves chasing and being chased.
I’m not sure he’s all that welcome in this exclusive club, except by two lady pugs, Mona and Sadie. The highlight was a surprise visit by Santa. Waffles, who thinks he’s a media star, photobombed every other dog’s photos. My daughter had to pull him out of other puppy pics more than once.
Waffles with Santa at the park.
Another day, I discovered someone decorated our park with style! They covered three park benches with Christmas joy. Nobody knows who is responsible, but we all appreciated it.
Someone surprised our park community with Christmas bench covers and pillows.
I’m grateful for our park and the daily joy it gave me. In my new neighborhood, we have a tiny park where I see dog owners meet up, too. It’s tempting to think about getting my own little dog, but Olive the cat would have a fit.
Do you have a special outdoor place in your life?If you’re the owner of a dog, do you meet up with other dog owner to socialize and let your dogs play?
This is a wreath I made several years ago for our Palm Springs home. I found a spot for it on our gate in Arizona. The wreath has nothing to do with this story, but I found it in the garage and we hung it yesterday.
I read about the correct way to drink coffee in the Wall Street Journal and wrote about it HERE. That was a little over two weeks ago and I’ve followed the plan wondering if I could tell the difference or not. I’m surprised to report that it REALLY works for me! Who knew?
I feel better, I’m more alert. I have lost that groggy feeling I’d have when I needed coffee to get out of bed. The trick is that you don’t drink coffee right away, but wait 60 to 90 minutes to allow your body to naturally wake up. Cortisol is the hormone that tells your body to be awake and responsive. Having coffee right away interferes with the natural process.
Instead of my husband bringing me a cup of coffee and placing it on my nightstand — which he has done for the past 36 years — he has converted to bringing me hot water with one quarter of a lemon. The hot lemon water has its own benefits, smells wonderful and is cleansing.
I don’t have my cup of coffee until after I’ve written my morning pages. I’ve adopted my morning routine by following “The Artist’s Way” by Julia Cameron. Then I do daily Bible readings, get out of bed and get ready to walk. I’m fully awake and ready to go — and sometimes I forget to have coffee altogether when I return.
I was very skeptical about this and surprised how this small change makes me feel better and more productive.
If you’re a coffee-first-thing-in the-morning person, give this a try. I’d like to hear if it had the same positive effect for you, too.Will you be willing to give it a try?
I knew there would be another variant once the first, second and third waves of COVID passed us by. What I’m afraid of is traveling for Christmas. We have plans to go to California for a week and have our kids and our son’s girlfriend’s family join us. We’re a Merry group of 12.
With Omicron officially in California this week, will there be sheltering in place in Calif.? Will there be travel restrictions for out-of-staters like us? This could seriously put a damper on our plans — and be quite costly as well.
Early in the Calif. shutdowns, travelers from out of state were required to quarantine for two weeks. My husband had driven back to his office in CA from AZ to meet with a client and get some things out of his office. He wasn’t allowed in the building without the two-week quarantine.
With the vaccines will things be open? Only time will tell and seriously there isn’t a heck of a lot of time before our Christmas-week trip. It’s past the cancellation date for our Airbnb, too. I’m hoping and praying for the best and that this two-year planned gathering goes forward.
All I want for Christmas is to be with my family.
Waffles in his cozy Christmas sweater.
Are you seeing any new COVID restrictions where you live? Do you think things will be normal for the holidays? Do you have plans to travel and would you cancel those plans?
I wrote this three years ago today — well before the COVID days. Back then we had a crowd for Christmas and lots of activities to fill our days. We hosted my children, dad, and my son’s girlfriend’s family for Christmas. His girlfriend’s family includes seven siblings and mom. The two years they stayed with us to celebrate Christmas were amazing. We are hosting them this Christmas this year.
One year ago, we moved out of state and out of our home of 28 years. I had to remind myself to TAKE TIME TO BREATHE — which I absolutely need to do today.
My children’s first Christmas picture together.
This is what I wrote three years ago today:
It’s that time of year and feeling festive, I agreed to go to more events than normal. But while I’m bouncing from event to event, I’m stressed thinking of all the work I have at home to do.
Last night I was downtown for the Palm Springs Walk of the Inns and the Palm Springs Woman’s Club. I baked a double batch of snickerdoodles for the bake sale for the PSWC. Today I’m off to a luncheon fashion show with a friend at Wally’s. But, I really have so much stuff to do around the house to get ready for Christmas.
I have to find a tree! I have to clean out my kids’ rooms for the guests (We invited my son’s girlfriend and her family to stay with us Christmas week.) I have to meal plan and grocery shop and yeah — shop for presents, too. So many to dos are filling my lists. It’s freaking me out a bit.
The entire tree thing seems too much. There’s a tree seller down the street and during an evening walk, my husband and I stopped by to look. I only want a little tree, nothing stupendous. Just a four-footer or so. I just about choked when I saw the price tag on the smallest tree on the lot — $225! I remember when I’d pick up a tree in front of the grocery store for $30. I’ve been against fake trees on principle all these years. But, I think those principles are now telling me that it’s a crime to buy a real tree and pay a small fortune just to have the garbage man haul it off in a couple weeks. It seems so wasteful to destroy a tree, too, for a few week’s pleasure.
My son in the Palm Springs Christmas Lights parade in the Nutcracker Sleigh next to the Sugar Plum Fairy (pink tutu). He was the Balanchine bunny on stage with our local ballet company.
One funny story about the Christmas tree lot near our house: I remember when my kids were young and one night we walked there to pick out a tree. My husband carried our toddler son on his shoulders. I was pushing the stroller with our infant daughter while holding on to our Rottie’s leash. We walked the few blocks to the tree lot and began walking in an out of the rows of trees. Something jumped out from under one of the trees — scaring me to death! It was Sherman our black cat! I guess he couldn’t stand being left out. I had to walk back to the house with baby and dog in tow, herding the cat home, too!
Now with my busy schedule on my mind, it’s my saving grace to take time for myself. I’m grounded with my morning routine of walking, praying and writing. I am forcing myself to swim at noon Masters a couple days a week. And then I find a moment to sit in the back yard, close my eyes, listen to the birds and breathe.
What’s your secret for staying calm through all the Holiday fun activities and things you have to do? Wow! I miss my pre C0VID days and a whole different idea of stress. I’d love to get back to the worry I had back then. What do you think if you look back to 2019 or 2018?
What do you think the long term outcome will be for parents posting every moment of their kids’ lives on social media?
I’m not pointing fingers, because yes, I was guilty of this myself.
Do you remember when once a year relatives or close friends would come over and the slide projector and screen would come out? Or, when you sat with a bowl of popcorn on the carpet with the cousins at your grandparents house watching old slides of your parents?
For decades parents have loved to photograph their kids. That’s because our kids are the most gorgeous and special human beings on the planet. Even Lucy took lots of photos of Little Ricky. There’s an episode about that.
I took tons of photos of my kids when they were babies and toddlers. I took less and less as they got older until our phones got cameras. I was guilty of taking photos whenever I could. And posting them on Facebook. Now, I don’t take as many photos of my kids, because when we’re together, I just want to be with them in the moment. And I’m not as active on Facebook, either.
I wrote the following post six years ago wondering what would happen when parents post photos of their kids all the time. Well, six years later, we’ve seen plenty of negative things. Some positive, too. Did we have “influencers” six years ago? When you read the excerpts of the articles I included, please remember they are dated. But they were already seeing issues.
Post from October 2015:
First Christmas photo shoot with a real photographer for my baby girl. ‘Kat in the Hat.”
Thank goodness we didn’t have Facebook when my kids were young. We barely had internet. We had a modem and I could send files of work to a printer. There was no way to share every minute detail and selfie of our day. Instead, I took my film downtown to the photo shop that made double prints. Then I wrote a card or letter by hand to my mom or dad and inserted the photos and mailed them the old fashioned way. Here’s the end result of my old fashioned film and camera. A closet with shelves filled with photo albums.
A few of my photo albums, filled with real live pictures.
My fear is that we are raising kids who think they are more self-important than they really are. Their every move is recorded and shared with the world. As they grow older and have their own Instagram, Snapchat etc. will they try harder and harder to get noticed? Will the photos get more outrageous and provocative? Look at me????
Christmas photo shoot 1996.
I’ve been reading articles about this phenomenon. Here’s a related article I wrote on whether or not our kids get too much glory. Following are some excerpts and links from CNN and US News. Some report skyrocketing anxiety and depression as a result of too much social media.
“The 2014 National College Health Assessment, a survey of nearly 80,000 college students throughout the United States, found that 54% of students reported experiencing overwhelming anxiety in the past 12 months and that 32.6% “felt so depressed that it was difficult to function” during the same period. The study also found that 6.4% had “intentionally, cut, burned, bruised or otherwise injured” themselves, that 8.1% had seriously considered suicide and that 1.3% had attempted suicide.
Ease up on the pressure. Do we really have to be noticed all the time? Does every second have to be a beauty contest? Our kids need to stop feeling that they have to outperform their peers every minute of every day. They need to know that they don’t have to market themselves constantly, and that social media can be a mechanism for fostering collaborative relationships — not a medium for fueling competition, aggression and irresponsible behavior that contributes to anxiety and depression.” More from CNN here.
Here’s another article with an interesting point of view on selfies and a teen’s self worth. Read more from US News here.
“Social media use can turn into a problem when a teen’s sense of self worth relies on peer approval, Proost says. Whether they’re posting from the football game bleachers or on a family vacation, teens can access social media anywhere and at all times. And because of the constant connection, it can be dangerous for young people overly concerned with others’ opinions. They may feel like they can never escape the social environment and are constantly faced with peer pressure.
“The mental health outcomes that we’re starting to look at now are things like body dysmorphic disorder, obsessive compulsive disorder, depression and anxiety,” Proost says. “We are starting to see those things creep up and be related conditions to excessive [social media] use.”
If we know an overuse of social media can be fun, but also have consequences that negatively impact our children—why are we leading and feeding them down this road?
Don’t get me wrong. I love FB. I’m learning Instagram. I LOVE that I’ve reconnected with friends and family and get to share in their lives. I say to keep an eye out for when it gets out of hand.
What are your thoughts on a generation of kids whose every move has been recorded and shared? Do you think moms should post photos of their kids all the time on social media? Do you think that has an effect on the children’s social media habits?
