Tag Archives: daughter

Happy Birthday Dear Daughter!

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daughter
My beautiful daughter at the beach.

Happy birthday to my sweet, funny and witty daughter.

Kat in a dry suit at the beach with big brother Robert.

I love this photo of my daughter because it shows her personality. I used to write about her all the time. But she told me to stop it. She said “I’m not your content.”

We used to spend summers in Laguna Beach to escape the high heat of Palm Springs (most days are over 110 degrees and some days reach 125 degrees!) Those are my favorite memories. My husband would be stuck working at home, except for weekends, while I took the kids to play in the waves and sand during the week. My daughter was a little princess and hated to wear a wet suit as a toddler. She’d strip naked as soon as her suit got wet. I brought a bag full of swim suits to keep her comfortable and clothed.

Now she’s a sufficient adult, working and making ends meet. She’s interested in comedy and has taken classes in writing comedy as well as stand up. She’s courageous enough to have performed live on stage in San Francisco. I can’t say how proud I am of her to do that! Talk about taking a leap and getting out of your comfort zone. But maybe it is in her comfort zone?

There’s a sad side to her birthday for her and many of us. A friend she had in college shared the same birthday. I wrote about Lauren McCluskey HERE. I’m now making an annual donation to the foundation her mother set up in Lauren’s memory ever since I found out Lauren and my daughter shared birthdays. Lauren was shot and murdered while talking to her mother on the phone, walking home from night class. There’s a lot more to the story that is really hard.

I am so grateful to have my daughter in my life. I can’t imagine the pain that Lauren’s mother goes through on her birthday and every day.

Here’s a link to the Lauren McCluskey Foundation if you care to make a donation on her birthday. https://laurenmccluskey.org/

Virtual campaign in honor of Lauren’s Birthday scheduled for February 12th, 2025

Happy birthday to my wonderful daughter! I love her so much.

What are some of your favorite memories of your childhood or when your children were young?

What I miss about my daughter

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I wrote this when we dropped our daughter off at college several years ago. Now that she’s living in the adult world — I still miss these things about her. We were lucky to have her sheltering in place with us for a couple of months. That was one of the good things that happened in 2020 — not COVID-19 and being locked down — but getting the chance to spend time together.  

excited child at the beach
Kat at Carpinteria State Beach

We took our daughter to college two weeks ago. She looks really happy in the photos posted on FB and Instagram. She’s made new friends, is enjoying her team and coaches — and likes her classes.

My life is busy with new and old projects. But, I notice a quiet, a sort of waiting sense, that I didn’t feel before. It’s the little things about her that I miss.

close up of swimmer swimming butterfly
Kat swimming

I miss her cracking my back. She would give me a hug, tell me to relax and say, “One, two..” and lift me up in the air before she said three. The result was cracking, popping relief.

I miss her making me laugh. Kat is funny. I love her little half smile when she knows she’s especially clever. And the crinkles around her eyes when she laughs out loud.

I miss her cleaning out my wallet and organizing it for me. She’d say, “Mom your purse is a gateway to hoarding.”

I miss her walking through the kitchen door after her morning workout asking me to make her eggs. I don’t have anyone to make eggs for right now — except my husband and me — and we rarely eat them.

I miss her cat Olive walking on the skinny end of her four poster bed while she watched Netflix on my laptop.

precious baby kitten
Baby Olive

I miss when she was very young and called yellow “lallo.”  And when we’d go to the beach and she’d strip naked as soon as her suit got wet. I used to bring a bag full of swimsuits for her.

Kat in a dry suit at the beach with big brother Robert.
Kat in a dry suit at the beach with big brother Robert.

I miss going to the pool and watching practice, chatting with the other swim parents. That was a luxury that I took for granted.

Yes, I miss her and I hope she knows how much I love her.

Kat making an entrance into the room.
Kat making an entrance into the room.

What are the little things you miss the most about your kids who have left home — or friends you no longer see very often?

Are you superstitious?

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Angus our yellow lab and Sherman our black cat (RIP.)

Sherman and Angus lived to ripe old ages of 17 and 15 respectively. I was surprised when my husband’s uncle came over years ago and I discovered he was superstitious about black cats.

Yesterday, I was ready to take my daily trip to the post office with my husband’s client gifts. My plan is to go five days in a row with a dozen packages. Any more than that, my mind gets muddled writing addresses and I make mistakes. Plus, the dirty looks from the patrons behind me, isn’t fun. Once I had a woman cursing at me. My daughter was with me and I was afraid she’d beat up the woman attacking her mom. So, 10 to 12 packages gets me under the radar of the impatient. (Boy, do I miss my daughter’s help with this annual project!)

I counted the packages as I put them in bags to carry. 13. I had 13 packages. That wouldn’t do. Why not? I guess I’m superstitious, too. I notice I avoid the number 13 at all costs. I took one package out and saved it for the next day. Whew! That was close.

Are you superstitious? What about? Do you change what you’re doing because of superstitions?

Sherman helping me with my work. Actually, Sherman wanting attention from me and telling me to stop working.

Another life saved

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my daughter and Waffles
Waffles the pug with my daughter during a beach vacation.

My kids like to call me when they’re walking. Yesterday, while my daughter was walking Waffles around her neighborhood I heard her say “Oh no!”

“What?”

She talked softly, “There’s someone laying on the sidewalk. Probably a homeless person.” My daughter explained that they look away from homeless people, that they don’t want to engage them. My kids live in the Bay Area where homelessness is a problem.

“He’s bleeding!” she said. It looked to her like he had slit his wrists. She ended her call with me. Minutes later she called me back and said he was conscious and was trying to get up. I suggested calling the police but she didn’t think they would help. She tried calling some mental health crisis centers, but nobody answered. Apparently crisis hotlines are staffed at night, not in the morning.

She called me again and said she asked if he wanted her to call someone or if should she call 911. He told her to call 911 because he couldn’t get up. She did and asked for the police and an ambulance. She waited with him until they came along with the fire department.

Another life saved by my daughter.

As a lifeguard she saved a drowning young boy. Then one evening in Laguna Beach, she and my husband went for a walk and a swim. She saw two people struggling in a rip tide. It was hours after the lifeguards were off duty. She swam out to them and told them what to do, to stay calm and helped them in. My husband swam out after her and they were able to get the people — who were drunk — safely onshore.

On her way back to the vacation cottage, she spotted the neighbors dog loose. She brought the dog back safely to its yard.

Yes I’m proud of my daughter to have empathy and to be able to help those in need. She said people were walking by ignoring the man. She was the only one who stopped to help.

What would you do if you saw someone who was probably homeless, bleeding on the sidewalk? Do you think you’d try to help? Or more likely walk away? Honestly, I don’t know what I’d do.

Christmas for the dogs

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Christmas 2019, our daughter and Waffles the Pug came to stay. This was a mere few months pre-COVID and a global pandemic was the furthest thing from my mind.

It was during a pre-COVID Christmas break that I learned something new about the park by our old home. It’s a great place to meet other dog owners. In fact, we found a group of little dog owners who gather at 4 p.m. and let their dogs play together. Waffles, who is not at all shy, was trying to take over the group and loves chasing and being chased.

I’m not sure he’s all that welcome in this exclusive club, except by two lady pugs, Mona and Sadie. The highlight was a surprise visit by Santa. Waffles, who thinks he’s a media star, photobombed every other dog’s photos. My daughter had to pull him out of other puppy pics more than once.

Santa surprised the puppies at the park.
Waffles with Santa at the park.

Another day, I discovered someone decorated our park with style! They covered three park benches with Christmas joy. Nobody knows who is responsible, but we all appreciated it.

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Waffles on a park bench someone decorated
Someone surprised our park community with Christmas bench covers and pillows.

I’m grateful for our park and the daily joy it gave me. In my new neighborhood, we have a tiny park where I see dog owners meet up, too. It’s tempting to think about getting my own little dog, but Olive the cat would have a fit.

Do you have a special outdoor place in your life? If you’re the owner of a dog, do you meet up with other dog owner to socialize and let your dogs play?