Tag Archives: Birthday

Happy Birthday!

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Today is my son’s birthday. This is a photo from a summer in Laguna Beach of my son, daughter and Angus, the best dog ever. We adopted Angus from Guide Dogs of the Desert after his hips were found to be “FAIR” and not “EXCELLENT.”

In honor of my son’s and Angus’s March 26 birthdays (RIP Angus), I’m posting a story I wrote that was published in the Los Angeles Times Kids’ Reading Room. It’s based on my son’s birthday in the second grade when he wanted to invite 50 kids to his birthday party.

A Birthday for the Dogs

“MOM, I’m inviting 50 kids to my party.”

“What, Robert?” Mom said. “That’s too many. Do you know 50 kids?”

I sat in the back seat while Mom drove home after school. My eighth birthday was in two weeks. 

“There’s my class, plus Cub Scouts, and playgroup.”

“I can’t afford to take 50 kids skating or bowling. And I don’t want 50 kids in my house. What about the city pool? It’s heated, open year-round, and it’s only 50¢ a kid,” Mom said.

“A swim party, that’s cool!” I said.

“I’ll say yes to the party, but no to presents. Fifty presents is too much for one 8-year-old. It’s decadent.”

“What’s decadent?” I asked. Mom used words I didn’t know.

“Self-indulgent, corrupt.”

I sat silently and thought I’d be sad with no presents. Then I remembered Angus. Mom got him for me as an early birthday present. We were on a waiting list for two years with Guide Dogs of the Desert. He was being trained as a companion dog for people who couldn’t see. We got him because he had poor hips and couldn’t be a working dog. Angus was big, yellow, and I loved him. We shared the same birthday.

“I have a great idea!”

“What?” Mom asked, glancing at me in her rearview mirror.

“I’ll ask for money for Guide Dogs of the Desert.”

“Ah?” Mom made a weird swalloing noise.

“It’s Angus’s birthday, too.”

In the rearview mirror I watched Mom dab at the corner of her eyes with a tissue, and nod her head in agreement.

Two weeks later, I had a great birthday. Fifty kids came with bathing suits, towels and money. Instead of opening presents after cake, we counted dollars they had stuffed into a large jar decorated with photos of Angus. 

Together, we raised more than $1,600 for Guide Dogs. Mom called me a “philanthropist” – whatever that is.

What special birthday memories do you have?

Happy Birthday Dear Daughter!

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daughter
My beautiful daughter at the beach.

Happy birthday to my sweet, funny and witty daughter.

Kat in a dry suit at the beach with big brother Robert.

I love this photo of my daughter because it shows her personality. I used to write about her all the time. But she told me to stop it. She said “I’m not your content.”

We used to spend summers in Laguna Beach to escape the high heat of Palm Springs (most days are over 110 degrees and some days reach 125 degrees!) Those are my favorite memories. My husband would be stuck working at home, except for weekends, while I took the kids to play in the waves and sand during the week. My daughter was a little princess and hated to wear a wet suit as a toddler. She’d strip naked as soon as her suit got wet. I brought a bag full of swim suits to keep her comfortable and clothed.

Now she’s a sufficient adult, working and making ends meet. She’s interested in comedy and has taken classes in writing comedy as well as stand up. She’s courageous enough to have performed live on stage in San Francisco. I can’t say how proud I am of her to do that! Talk about taking a leap and getting out of your comfort zone. But maybe it is in her comfort zone?

There’s a sad side to her birthday for her and many of us. A friend she had in college shared the same birthday. I wrote about Lauren McCluskey HERE. I’m now making an annual donation to the foundation her mother set up in Lauren’s memory ever since I found out Lauren and my daughter shared birthdays. Lauren was shot and murdered while talking to her mother on the phone, walking home from night class. There’s a lot more to the story that is really hard.

I am so grateful to have my daughter in my life. I can’t imagine the pain that Lauren’s mother goes through on her birthday and every day.

Here’s a link to the Lauren McCluskey Foundation if you care to make a donation on her birthday. https://laurenmccluskey.org/

Virtual campaign in honor of Lauren’s Birthday scheduled for February 12th, 2025

Happy birthday to my wonderful daughter! I love her so much.

What are some of your favorite memories of your childhood or when your children were young?

Travel and sickness

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Pretty kitty
Olive hanging out on the guest bed. The bedding was my daughter’s growing up.

Yesterday was my son’s birthday. I was going to repost my son’s birthday story, where he asked to have 50 kids for his second grade birthday party. We had adopted Angus, our yellow lab, from Guide Dogs of the Desert the year before. I wrote about his birthday party in honor of Angus where our son asked for donations to Guide Dogs instead of presents. He raised $1,600. You can read the story HERE.

I remember our family driving to Guide Dogs to meet Angus. I was nervous about the dog and after we had him in the car, I ran back into the office to ask if I could bring him back — if he didn’t work out. The woman looked at me like I was crazy.

Then she said, “Here are his medical records.” I looked at the paperwork and noticed Angus shared the same birthday with my son. I realized that was it. There was no going back.

We loved Angus until after my son went off to college. My daughter was a junior in high school when we had to say good-bye.

When I looked at my posts from last year, I discovered I had COVID this week in 2023. I had traveled to Washington state to spread my mom’s ashes on her birthday and got sick.

Last week, I got sick after my trip to Santa Barbara which I planned for my mom’s birthday. I’m very stuffed up, have a low-grade fever and I’m achy. I can’t stand being sick and this is my second bug since Christmas. Strange that every time I travel, I seem to get sick.

This current bug was because a woman who was on our tour by shuttle bus sneezed and coughed on us. Why she didn’t bow out of activities and stay in the gorgeous hotel was beyond me. I would have.

Actually, I never got sick traveling to Mexico by car. It’s only when I fly somewhere. In Puerto Penasco, our beach get away four hours south, we eat meals outdoors, we stay in a condo and we’re apart from other people. However, I read that last week they found seven bodies outside of town all shot. They were all men, wearing military gear and our government identified them as cartel members. So, no Mexico for me right now.

Do you get sick after traveling? Or is it just me?

What do you think of people who won’t stay home when they’re sick?

Remembering Mom

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It will be a year this week when my Aunt and I traveled to Washington State to spread my mom’s ashes at our family property. It would have been Mom’s birthday. I’ve been feeling a little weepy knowing that her birthday is this week. I miss my mom.

Here’s what I wrote last year:

Private road through the woods

This is the private road through the woods to our family’s riverfront property. We ran across this obstacle on our journey.

My aunt and I made the trek to Robe Valley where our family has owned property along the Stillaguamish River since the crash of ’29. Our mission was to spread my mother’s ashes in a place of beauty that she loved.

At dinner the night before at my brother’s home, we celebrated mom’s life. I was surrounded with love from my brother, sister-in-law, niece and nephew, spouses, their children and of course my mom’s little sister.

I worried about the condition of our road to the river. Would it be too muddy? Would it be flooded? We were told we’d need a chainsaw this time of year to make it to the river.

“We don’t do chainsaws,” I said.

My aunt who turns 80 this year, nodded her head in agreement.

gate to private road
A new gate to our property.

Our first obstacle was a new gate. Prior to this gate, we had a chain across our road. Fortunately, I packed the key that was mailed to me by a distant relative a few months ago. Whew! It worked!

When we stopped at the fallen branches blocking the road, I was able to push and hold them back while my aunt gunned the accelerator and drove through.

Then something surprising happened. A Great Blue Heron rose from a low branch and flew up in front of us. The Great Blue Heron was my mom’s favorite bird. In the 80-plus years this property has been in the family, no one has seen one there before.

My aunt said “Mary is that you?” (Mary is my mother’s name.)

The heron kept flight directly in front of our car as we made our way down the road. Literally we were looking up and forward.

I’m reminded of a post of Vicki’s at Victoria Ponders with these words from her dear friend:

Look Up.  Look Forward.

HTTPS://VICTORIAPONDERS.COM/

It was a sight or a sign. It was other worldly. I didn’t get a photo or video, but the four-foot tall bird guiding us down the road is etched in my mind.

We reached the river without further obstacles, prayed and spread my mom’s ashes along with blue hydrangea blossoms (blue was my mother’s favorite color and she loved hydrangeas.)

We left in peace knowing Mom was put to rest in one of the most beautiful places that she loved. Her dear cousin’s ashes were spread there the previous year.

river view
Where we spread ashes with snow on the riverbanks and snow capped mountains in the distance.
Stilaguamish River in Washington state.
View across the river from our property.

Who do you miss most in your life? How do you celebrate their memory?

A Day of Rest

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A view from our walk.
View of the desert.

I had several plans for my birthday. I signed up for lap swimming at the YMCA. I was planning on going to my favorite cafe. I wanted to go for a hike.

But when I got up, I felt like doing nothing. I decided I’d like to sit around and read for my birthday. I was reading the Wall Street Journal and I ran across two interesting articles about doing nothing. I had no idea that my new birthday plans were trending.

One article was written by Ben Zimmer and was about Hurkle Durkle:

The unpredictable pathways of language usage never cease to amaze. Who could have foreseen that one of the trendiest words of 2024 would be an old Scottish term for lounging around in bed?

That word is the delightfully reduplicative “hurkle-durkle,” which has taken TikTok and other social media outlets by storm. As defined by the Dictionary of the Scots Language, it’s a verb meaning “to lie in bed or lounge about when one should be up and about.” That dictionary cites an older one published in 1825 by John Jamieson, who reported that the word came from the dialect spoken in Fife, a peninsula in eastern Scotland.

https://www.wsj.com/lifestyle/to-hurkle-durkle-or-lounge-in-bed-is-a-tiktok-trend-thats-200-years-old-ad9e7c52?mod=lifestyle_lead_pos5

The other was about a new vacation trend doing nothing on vacation called:

The Rise of the Do-Nothing Vacation

More travelers say they want to make relaxation their top priority while on holiday

By Allison Pohle and Rachel Wolfe

The pendulum is swinging away from jam-packed trips and Instagram-worthy adventures and toward vacations with little to write home about beyond a pretty sunset and a cold drink.

More vacationers say they want a true break to rest and recharge during their time off. Their do-nothing vacations have no schedule. These aren’t beach trips that involve surfing or kayaking, or foodie tours requiring hours of research—and decision fatigue.

https://www.wsj.com/lifestyle/travel/vacation-trends-resorts-all-inclusive-relax-ce3f9026?mod=lifestyle_trendingnow_article_pos2

The third article I read was about a mommy blogger who was making seven figures by Sara Ashley O’Brien:

She Was a Mommy Blogger. Now She’s Covering Trump and Kennedy on the Trail—and Making a Fortune.

Jessica Reed Kraus built a massive following by sharing celebrity gossip on Instagram. Now she’s on the campaign trail and running a growing media brand.

SAN CLEMENTE, Calif.—For a year during the pandemic, Jessica Reed Kraus and her husband, Mike, rented out the two-room hideaway behind their ranch-style home to help support their family of six.

Then came Depp v. Heard. 

Kraus, a stay-at-home mom who’d built a following as a lifestyle blogger, was part of the frenzy surrounding the 2022 defamation trial of Johnny Depp and Amber Heard. She shared salacious stories from anonymous sources about Heard’s personal life and quotes from a phone call she said she received from Depp. Kraus told her followers she had once believed the actor was abusive, as Heard’s lawyers alleged in court. But now, she was taking his side. 

https://www.wsj.com/style/jessica-reed-kraus-house-inhabit-rfk-jr-trump-kennedy-newsletter-e17077c4?mod=lifestyle_lead_pos1

Wait a minute. I was a mommy blogger. Why didn’t I make seven figures? Maybe because I’d rather do nothing.

Have you ever heard of hurkle durkle?

Why do you think doing nothing is a new trend?

Do you ever feel the need for a day off of activities?

What I Miss About My Daughter

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Happy birthday to my daughter! Yes, I miss her, but I’m happy she’s living near my son and DIL, has her pug Waffles and a job she enjoys.

I wrote this when we dropped our daughter off at college several years ago. Now that she’s living in the adult world — I still miss these things about her. We were lucky to have her sheltering in place with us for a couple of months. That was one of the good things that happened in 2020 — not COVID-19 and being locked down — but getting the chance to spend time together.  

excited child at the beach
Kat at Carpinteria State Beach on a camping trip.

We took our daughter to college two weeks ago. She looks really happy in the photos posted on FB and Instagram. She’s made new friends, is enjoying her team and coaches — and likes her classes.

My life is busy with new and old projects. But, I notice a quiet, a sort of waiting sense, that I didn’t feel before. It’s the little things about her that I miss.

close up of swimmer swimming butterfly
Kat swimming

I miss her cracking my back. She would give me a hug, tell me to relax and say, “One, two..” and lift me up in the air before she said three. The result was cracking, popping relief.

I miss her making me laugh. Kat is funny. I love her little half smile when she knows she’s especially clever. And the crinkles around her eyes when she laughs out loud.

I miss her cleaning out my wallet and organizing it for me. She’d say, “Mom your purse is a gateway to hoarding.”

I miss her walking through the kitchen door after her morning workout asking me to make her eggs. I don’t have anyone to make eggs for right now — except my husband and me — and we rarely eat them.

I miss her cat Olive walking on the skinny end of her four poster bed while she watched Netflix on my laptop.

precious baby kitten
Baby Olive

I miss when she was very young and called yellow “lallo.”  When we’d go to the beach, she’d strip naked as soon as her suit got wet. I used to bring a bag full of swimsuits for her.

Kat in a dry suit at the beach with big brother Robert.
Kat in a dry suit at the beach with big brother Robert.

I miss going to the pool and watching practice, chatting with the other swim parents. That was a luxury that I took for granted.

Yes, I miss her and I hope she knows how much I love her. Happy birthday!

Kat making an entrance into the room.
Kat making an entrance into the room.

What are the little things you miss the most about your kids who have left home — or friends you no longer see very often?

Walking along Frank Sinatra

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We took a morning walk down a street called Frank Sinatra this weekend while we were in the Palm Springs area. This is the view from Palm Desert of Mt. San Jacinto. The mountain is a few blocks from the backyard of our old home. Many of the streets are named after celebrities including Bob Hope, Gerald Ford, Dinah Shore, Gene Autry and Fred Waring. My kids didn’t know that Fred Waring was a person. But they heard of Dinah Shore when Leonardo DiCaprio moved into Dinah Shore’s old house — next door to one of their school mates.

Frank Sinatra’s compound is on Frank Sinatra Drive, which might be the reason for the street’s name. I once interviewed to be Sinatra’s assistant’s assistant and entered his property for an interview. One of my ballet friends had the job and she was asked to refer people for the position because she was moving to LA. It turned out the job paid about 25% less than what I was making in PR for a local developer, so working with the Sinatras was not enough of a pull for me to change jobs.

We had a busy weekend with my dad’s 92nd birthday, visiting clients and attending a friend’s funeral. That’s why we drove about five hours Saturday and five hours on Sunday.

View of Desert Willow golf course from a sidewalk along Frank Sinatra.

Mt. San Jacinto Palm Springs
The view of Mt. San Jacinto from my morning walks when I lived in Palm Springs.
This was a park a few blocks from our house.

What did you do this past weekend that you enjoyed?