Category Archives: anxiety

Not So Good Memories…

Posted on by
65

This was the entrance to our Palm Springs home of 28 years — inside our courtyard.

The courtyard photo above is inside this big gate.

We do have wonderful memories living there. When we moved in, I was pregnant with our first child. We raised our kids here and it was the only home they had growing up. We had swim banquets in the backyard. Plus, lots of kids over to play hide and seek and a game called sardines. We had several prom dinners and get togethers, too. So much good stuff.

But the last two years, 2019 and 2020, things changed. I was reminded of this with the creepy videos from Nancy Guthries Nest camera.

We had our own creepy guy. This is him. We called the police when we found him asleep in our courtyard on the steps to the backyard. For the first time in 26 years, we had to close our wooden gates daily and at night. They had metal rods that fell into the ground and could only be opened from the inside — or so we thought.

The police said his name was Marco and that he was harmless. But he thought he bought our house and left us notes that he’d physically remove us. My thoughts were that he was harmless until he wasn’t!

The pounding you hear is Marco breaking through the gates. Then he’d move to the steps and archway and pound on that lock.

He was relentless. Once he moved a barbecue into our courtyard. Every time we’d travel, I’d check the Nest feed and there he was. I’d go for walks to the park and when I’d return, Marco was in our yard. We had a friend’s daughter house and cat-sit for us while we were on vacation. She found a pile of blankets and called to ask if they were ours. No. She was terrified and her dad took over.

A neighbor helped us install padlocks on the gate. This is Marco checking out the gate in the daytime.

This was not top of mind until the Nancy Guthrie videos were shown. It’s scary to think there are so many people wandering around people’s houses at night. The police felt sorry for me because I was so frightened. They’d take Marco to jail and he’d be right back within two days. There wasn’t anything the police could do.

I prefer visitors like the bobcat above entering my yard, compared to Marco. I’m happy to be out in the wilds of Arizona with wildlife and not living downtown in Palm Springs.

Have you had strangers in your yard like Marco? If so, what did you do?

What are your thoughts about the Nancy Guthrie story?

Five Years Ago

Posted on by
49
Cactus Arizona sunset
Sunset in the neighborhood.

Five years ago this week we moved from sunny Palm Springs, California to sunny Arizona!

I wrote several posts about leaving my home of 28 years. It was stressful, sad, yet exciting. We had some snafus along the way. The movers didn’t bring a large enough moving van for all our stuff. They had to rent a U Haul. With everyone leaving California, they couldn’t find one close by. They had to rent one from San Diego.

We arrived in our new home without our stuff. (But we had a sedated Olive kitty, who was not a good traveler.) Fortunately, we had purchased the furniture in the casita from the prior owners, so we had a place to sleep! And I smartly packed bedding in one of our cars, plus overnight bags with changes of clothing.

Our stuff eventually caught up with us.

Here’s one of the posts from five years ago:

Moving On To Excitement

The past month, I’ve been all over the place emotionally. I’ve been through shock, disbelief, sadness, regret and anxiety. But I woke up today and I’ve moved on. I’m feeling the anticipation of a new adventure. I haven’t moved since 1992 and I’m excited for a new experience.

I don’t know what happened to change my point of view. It may be that the escrows are going well and it looks like all will close this week on both ends of the move. So that takes a chunk out of the anxiety. We worked really hard the past two weeks, packing, throwing stuff out and making daily trips to Angel View Thrift Store — and the end is in sight.

I wish my daughter would come and help us move. But with the state in a new COVID shut down until after Christmas, she viewed the flight home and driving one of our cars to Arizona for us as not “essential.” Of course, I viewed that differently. But I do understand. She doesn’t want to get us old folks sick. She doesn’t want to get her brother and significant other sick, either.

We were surprised by one of our dear Piranha Swim Team family friends who offered to help us out. They volunteered to drive one of our cars. We didn’t even have to ask. That makes me appreciate the life we’ve had here, the friendships that are so true and valuable.

We’ve been blessed and I am ready to move on, knowing those friendships will continue.

fountain with plants
Our Palm Springs yard all prettied up for sale.

What moves have you made? Did you experience mixed emotions?

What were you doing five years ago?

Black Friday

Posted on by
66

A beautiful poppa quail in a tree.

Now that the Thanksgiving Feasts are over, we turn the page to Black Friday. Why is the Friday after Thanksgiving called Black Friday? It’s a term from the 1960s coined by police in Philadelphia according to my searches on the internet. They used Black Friday to describe the increase in heavy traffic due to shopping. It also is the day that red ink turned black for stores thanks to shoppers.

I have found this week to be one of the most stressful thanks to my dad being admitted to the hospital last Friday. He’s a “Surviving Sue” person in my life, as a comparison to Dr. Vicki Atkinson’s book of the same title. You can read more about Dr. Vicki and her book on the blog Victoria Ponders.

I am the person in charge of talking to doctors, nurses, family members, selecting a skilled nursing facility, looking for assisted living, selling my dad’s house. Fortunately, by Thanksgiving, he was coherent, moved from the hospital to skilled nursing and is doing better.

We had one snafu. Years ago my dad and I went to his bank to put me on his account so bills could be paid in case he was in the hospital, unconscious, etc. I went into the bank in person with my notebook with his trust, will, power of attorney documents and learned that I was not on his account. I was added as a successor trustee, which means I can pay his bills after he dies. The bank didn’t accept the power of attorney documents and wants them to be redone.

All I can say is from my broken ankle and surgery, my kids’ two surgeries and now my dad, I’m ready to turn the page on 2025!

I hope everyone had a wonderful Thanksgiving.

What Black Friday deals are you looking for?

Are you ready for the holidays or wishing for a new year altogether?

Too much, too fast

Posted on by
58

One of the sea glass photos I took yesterday in the morning light. Two more photos are below.

I was on the phone Friday with a neighbor, talking about a funeral for another neighbor when my son called and called. I got off the phone, called my son back and was hit with the news that his surgery had been moved up. He asked if I could change my flights and hotel and come up to help him.

The level of panic and stress I immediately felt was due to the chaos at our Phoenix airport. We’re number three in the country for delays. Plus I’ve read that they may need to cancel 20% of flights.

I talked it over with my husband who decided to go with me. I called Southwest and they quickly changed our flights and it was at no additional cost. I also made sure they had Waffles the Pug on their guest list. Arranging new dates for the hotel was a little more difficult because of a poor connection and the person helping me had an accent that I struggled with.

I was relieved to get everything all arranged. But we are scheduled to leave in a day rather than two weeks. So, I’m feeling overwhelmed.

At our neighbor’s funeral on Saturday, we turned off the ringers on our phones. (It was an amazing service and it was an honor to be included for a celebration of life for such a unique, kind, intelligent man. I’m glad we got to know him during the past few years.)

We forgot to turn the ringers back on. My friend from Santa Barbara was stranded at the Phoenix airport and wanted to spend the night, but we missed her call and her husband’s. She was traveling back from the East Coast after visiting her mom. Her Phoenix to Santa Barbara connection was cancelled.

This doesn’t bode well for our upcoming flight to Oakland. But hopefully, we’ll make it in time to be helpful post our son’s surgery. The reason why they moved up his procedure? The nurses are going on strike the week he was previously scheduled. Oh my! What could go wrong on this trip?

The sun reflecting in the pool behind my mountain of sea glass.

Do you have any flights to be concerned about in the next few weeks?

Which sea glass photo do you like and why?

What relaxes me

Posted on by
77

I made an executive decision over the weekend that was difficult for me. It made my stomach hurt a wee bit, but I’m glad I did it. I decided to retire as our HOA newsletter editor after four years. I have a partner that works with me to create the newsletter and she also agreed with me. I am missing the joy and sense of accomplishment I once had. I wrote a resignation letter for the two of us and I’m waiting to hear back from the Board.

I found that photography is relaxing and rewarding to me. I enjoy taking my nature photos. I enjoy exploring Adobe Bridge and Photoshop and tinkering with the pictures to make them a bit better. I have decided to enroll in my second art workshop for DSLR photography beginning in January. This is becoming a lifestyle more than taking a random class.

Mourning Dove on our fence.

I also want to get back to writing and working on my several WIPs. If I get too busy with things I have to do, I don’t get in the time to write and edit.

Red is fortunately a constant in my backyard. I’m enjoying taking his photo along with Mrs. and various other creatures and plants.

Mrs. in a setting of purple flowers.

Agave with sharp red tips.

The same plant from a distance.

I never get tired of watching the squirrels.

Have you made any difficult decisions lately? When you are faced with a decision, how do you go about deciding what to do?

Sea Glass, Flora and Fauna Photos

Posted on by
43

I was surprised to get an email Tuesday that I needed to submit my Sea Glass Work In Progress for Thursday night’s photography class. After traveling to Northern California to help my kids, I hadn’t had a thought about photography in more than 10 days. Before I left town, I sent a few photos to my professor that I took with my Macro lens and asked him for suggestions. He pointed out that I needed to adjust a setting for “exposure compensation” to zero. It was set at -.7 and my photos were too dark.

So, Tuesday and Wednesday with my camera adjusted, I set out to take more sea glass photos. I also looked through my scanned images of kids and beach photos. Finally I settled on some and sent in my WIP. As I’m writing this, I haven’t had my Thursday night class yet, so I’m not sure what my feedback from the professor and students will be. It’s more than a little nerve wracking.

Here are photos I’ve taken this week since coming home:

Bougainvillea blossom from a new plant. The last plant was eaten at the roots by a raccoon, skunk or javelina.

A house sparrow at the bird bath. The little birds like the bird bath, rarely do the bigger birds use it.

Someone in Laguna decorated this city structure with shells and sea glass. This was an old photo I scanned from our summers in Laguna Beach.

Another sea glass photo from this week.

I identified this pretty shrub with blue flowers as “Imperial Blue.”

Red on his flamingo buddy.

Mrs. gets a turn.

Three more photos of Red, just because:

Happy Friday and weekend!

Which photos do you like best?

What plans do you have for Saturday and Sunday?

Travels with Waffles

Posted on by
74

I came home Saturday from helping my daughter post shoulder surgery. To help her more, I traveled home with her pug Waffles. This photo was taken at the airport.

A family who lives near her took care of Waffles while my daughter had surgery and for the week while I was helping out. That’s because my daughter was staying at our son and DIL’s apartment — and our son is deathly allergic to Waffles.

The family sent my daughter pictures and videos every day. One that made me laugh was the mom and two kids in bed with Waffles. The kids were fighting over who got to sleep with Waffles, so the mom had them all sleep together!

Waffles hangs out in the daytime in my husband’s office.

I was a little nervous about traveling with Waffles. I’ve never flown with an animal before. But he was a trooper. My daughter has flown with him lots of times since his puppyhood. Now he’s nine years old and a pro at air travel.

My daughter gave me the low down on traveling with Waffles. She said I had to have him in the carrier when I checked in. I was instructed to call the airlines to make a reservation for him and then pay $125 at the check in counter. He used to travel for free. The fee is a new add on along with $35 for a checked bag — which also used to be free.

She said once I checked in, I could walk him on a leash through the security line. I had to place the carrier in the luggage tub to be scanned along with my purse. Then I carried Waffles through the security check point. Once through security, Waffles was back on his feet and I walked him to the nearest pet relief station — of which my daughter knew the exact location.

While we were waiting for our flight, Waffles jumped back into his carrier and snored. I took him on one more trip to the pet relief station before our flight boarded. While I was walking with Waffles, a woman came up to me and said, “This is so unnecessary! You are adding to the chaos!”

“Whoah!” I thought. I was only walking a 20-pound, well-behaved dog on its leash! I turned to her and said, “I don’t have a choice. My daughter had surgery and I need to take her dog home. This is my chaos.”

I got a half grunted “Oh, I’m sorry,” in reply.

Once on the airplane with Waffles inside his carrier, it fit under the seat in front of me. He slept and snored the entire flight.

Waffles likes to sunbathe on the throw rug by the sliding glass doors. That’s where kitty Olive spent her mornings, too. The first thing we do in the morning is take Waffles for a walk around the neighborhood, to our little park, and back up to our home. He is ready to go! He seems to enjoy a strict routine. So do I!

Have you traveled with a pet? If so, did you find it easy?

What do you think of strangers voicing their opinion on what you’re doing?