Another week, another surgery

Rainbow in Santa Barbara during Christmas week.
A rainbow over the Christmas week VRBO.

This week I’m back taking care of my son in the Bay Area. He had surgery a few days ago. He heard the garbage truck coming, realized he forgot to take out the bins and raced down the stairs, breaking his foot. The last time I was here taking care of him, he had shoulder surgery from overuse injuries caused by swimming and rowing. That was several months ago, but not long enough for him to be healed and to be able to use crutches.

At Christmas week in Santa Barbara in the VRBO, he stayed on the main floor with us (mom and dad) and scooted around the kitchen and living room on his knee scooter. The main floor had the master bedroom and a small second bedroom. The rest of the “kids” — ages 21 to 34 — were on the lower level and out by the pool. I can only imagine how frustrating it was for him to be stuck with mom and dad.

He made the best of it and hopped down the spiral staircase a couple of times so he could sit with everyone by the pool.

I’m not sure what this week will bring. I’m sitting in his living room while he sleeps on the sofa with a cast on his foot. He has to return to remote work so I may be sitting quietly by getting ice for the ice machine and filling his water glass.

I brought a book I thought I’d read while I hang out in his house this week. But I finished more than half of it during during the plane ride. (Chanel Cleeton’s “When We Left Cuba.”) The good news is he and his girlfriend were Literature majors and they have a nice supply of books. I don’t need to get worried about finding another book to read.

shelves full of books and a knee scooter
Books and the knee scooter in my son’s living room.

What are you reading now? Have you taken care of your adult kids after surgery? We went out to dinner with friends the night before I left and they said they’d never do it. That their kids are on their own. What are your thoughts about that?

Views from Christmas Week

sunrise over the Pacific
Sunrise view from the VRBO deck.

We spent Christmas together with our kids and our son’s girlfriend and family. This is our third Christmas together. We missed 2020 due to COVID — or it would be number four. This year, we rented a VRBO between our home and the Bay Area (where everyone but us lives). The house was amazing and it was a wonderful few days with family. My daughter and I had a mother-daughter day while the rest went to Solvang. I absolutely loved our time alone together. We spent so much time together while she was growing up that it was taken for granted. Now it’s a huge gift.

Christmas photo in Santa Barbara
The Christmas Crew
The Anderson Bakery in Santa Barbara
One of our musts in Santa Barbara for breakfast.
Statue at the marina in Santa Barbara
Statue at the marina.
Seawall at the Santa Barbara marina.
Seawall at the marina where the ocean and seaweed splashes over the wall.
selfie of mom and daughter
Mother daughter selfie on our much needed day together.
Path over the Santa Barbara marina barrier
At the end of the seawall you can walk the plank to a small beach.
On the Alley fish tacos
Fish tacos from On the Alley in the Santa Barbara marina. The best. I’m trying to find something close in AZ.

All of my son’s girlfriend’s family play stringed instruments. Two of the seven are professional musicians and we enjoyed Christmas Eve, Christmas and post Christmas concerts in our living room. Below are two samples of the amazing music we were treated to.

Christmas Eve concert snippet.

Time for a road trip!

Last summer we went on two roads trips. One to Park City, Utah and the other to a tiny town on the California coast called Summerland. We skipped Utah this summer with our big move and all, but we’re heading out to Summerland. First we’ll stop and visit my 89-year-old dad in Palm Desert. Then head to a Vrbo near the beach.

VRBO beach rental near Santa Barbara
This is the cute house we’ll be staying in. The first year we stayed here I had just had knee surgery. I wasn’t prepared for all the stairs or the steep hills.

We’ve stayed in this house for a couple summer vacations. I’m not worried about COVID because it’s just the two of us. I wish our kids could join us as they have in the past, but with my son’s surgery, he’s not allowed to travel. And my daughter is working.

brother and sister photo at the beach.
I’ll be missing these two.

We’ve spent summer vacations since my son was born on the California coast. That’s because the weather is so inviting. Palm Springs and Scottsdale are both hot! I can’t wait for an ocean breeze. The beach vacation is my favorite part of the year. I think a change of scenery and weather will be motivating.

ocean views from living room windows
Ocean views and breeze in the living room

Where is your favorite place to vacation? Are you a mountain or a beach person?

To Swim or Not to Swim

I’m looking back on August’s past. Here’s a beach reflection from 2016.

13934949_10210575934898395_4223711866055404736_n

I’m a much better vacationer today than I was in my 20s. I’ve learned how to relax.

When I was in my 20s, my yearly vacation was spent going home to Washington where I grew up. I had to see and do all the PNW things. Ride a ferry to the islands, dig clams, fish, go hiking in the woods, go to the city, ride a bike around Greenlake, go to my cabin and spend the night, visit my best friend and my other best friends—and all my friends. Visit my favorite professors. I had my Daytimer with me and scheduled events by the half hour! It would drive my husband crazy and soon I made my annual jaunts home by myself.

IMG_0290

This year, we rented a house in a sleepy little beach town near Santa Barbara. Our good friends live close by and we had many fun meals together, planned at the last minute. We spent hours walking on the beach, riding beach cruisers through town and sitting on the beach reading. I am reading the third Neapolitan novel by Elena Ferrante and there’s nothing better in my mind than having long stretches of time to read a good book.

13880146_10210575966699190_5499508276428958217_n

My daughter came with us plus a swim friend from her age group days. Isn’t it amazing how swimming bonds friends through life? They’re both college swimmers and they ran, lifted weights, swam and got massages.

The only downfall of vacation was the spotting of great white sharks at the beach. Only two hours after the girls had an ocean swim, a 15-foot great white was spotted exactly where they had been swimming.

IMG_3338A lifeguard told me that last week, she watched a seal by the swimming dock. It was pulled underwater, tossed up and eaten by a large creature with a fin. She said it was like watching National Geographic as the water turned red.

I was looking forward to ocean swimming and kayaking. I was going to try SUP (stand up and paddle) for the first time. But, like I said, I’m better at vacations now and sitting on the beach with a book made more sense, given the great white sharks.

Video of the girls swimming before the sharks were spotted: 

What’s your favorite thing to do on vacation?

Are we doing good?

I wrote this five years ago about my summer vacation with family and friends at the beach. Yes, I miss those days!

My son learning to dive with the swim team.

My son learning to dive with the swim team. He’s third from the right.

“Do Good. Be Good. We’ll Be Doing Good.”

These are the words my son recorded for our voice mail message when he was four years old.  I saved that for years.

What a thoughtful thing for our young son to say! My husband and I adopted that saying as our family motto.

A walk on the UCSB campus during our vacation.

A walk on the UCSB campus during our vacation.

I try to do good. Be good. Some days it’s a bigger struggle than others. But, it’s something to think about, too. What are we doing with our lives? Are we making a difference? Is the world a better place because we are in it?

A lot has to do with our outlook. I’m definitely one of the “glass is half full” types. I try to look at the positive and stay away from those who are negative. Turning on the TV can put you into negativity land. I truly believe that we can stay positive by removing negative influences around us. Turn off the TV. Listen to music. Read interesting books and essays. Swim! Like Ray Bradbury said, “Garbage in, garbage out!”

My kids at the age when my son recorded the voice mail message.

My kids at the age when my son recorded the voice mail message. Vacation pic from years ago.

After spending a week in paradise—otherwise known as Carpinteria, CA—I look back on our vacation as perfect. We have great friends who live there who inspire me. I always come home with so much energy from being around positive, hard working entrepreneurs.

Also, my children spent a bit of the week with us. What a treat that was for me! With two college aged kids, having them together was priceless. We rode bikes, hiked, swam in the ocean, sailed, shared meals together. It’s hard to leave them, but I’m so thankful for the time we had together. That’s my glass half full talking as I sit in my lonely, quiet house once again.

Our main mode of transportation on our vacation.

Our main mode of transportation on our vacation.

I’m proud to say my kids look truly happy. They are definitely doing and being good.

My kids and friend.

My kids and friend.

Why I Like to Stay in Houses vs. Hotels

IMG_5107

The Colorado Airbnb.

This past weekend, we traveled to Colorado for a wedding. The bride was one of my children’s age group swimming teammates who played a big part in their swim and school lives. We’ve stayed close friends with her parents after bonding over years of volunteering for the team and going to meets. (Isn’t the swim world great?) They were one of the families I looked up to, who taught me the ropes about swim parenting. Not to brag, but their daughter swam in the Olympics–Beijing in high school and London in college, representing Singapore.

IMG_1493

The house we stayed at in the summer at the beach.

My kids insisted they were going to the wedding, which I was kind of hedging about. I mean, I wanted to go, but Colorado in the winter? They were going to go with or without us, so I finally agreed to go, too. I’m in Palm Springs, thank you very much, and I was stressed about flying in the snow, driving in the snow, and yes, even walking in the snow! We did have a six-hour delay flying due to a severe snow storm, so I had reason to worry.

Lately, when we travel with our adult kids, we look for rentals on Airbnb or VRBO. In the past years, we took a trip to Summerland, Calif., a few blocks from the beach where our kids joined us. We went to Park City, Utah, too. The kids were supposed to join us there but couldn’t take time off work. I like houses better because it’s nice to stretch out on the sofa, have a kitchen for snacks and meals and a full-sized living room. It’s so much better with family to have an entire house than staying in hotels where you have a bed and a coffee maker. I also believe it’s much more affordable.

IMG_5143

The claw-footed tub. One of two perfect bathrooms.

The house in Colorado this past weekend was really cute and fit us perfectly–in spite of the snow. We could walk (with our boots, parkas and gloves on) three blocks to downtown and some great restaurants. In Park City and Summerland, we also had great locations within a few blocks of the shops and main streets.

31663_1490672150577_4499686_n (1)

Back in high school: The bride and my son in their Physics class cardboard boat competition.

If it’s just my husband and me, or me traveling alone, a hotel is best. But, for a family, you cannot beat a home. FYI, the wedding was wonderful and the bride especially beautiful. It made me treasure our swim team days even more and reminded me of all the time our kids spent together for years and years.

IMG_5966

At the wedding with the bride and groom.

Here’s my review of this past weekend’s Airbnb:

This spotless, bright and airy home has every convenience you’ll need including a fully updated kitchen and plenty of outlets everywhere. It’s located three blocks to downtown. We loved the beautiful decor. Everywhere we looked there are unique touches, from a claw-footed tub, stained glass windows above a bedroom door to an antique door handle collection. In every room you’ll discover something special. The beds and bedding are comfy, too.

Which do you like better for vacations? Houses or hotels and why?

 

The mystery of the missing glasses

IMG_4240

Views from the morning beach walk.

We unpacked from vacation last night and I can’t find my glasses. This is especially bad, because I’m having eye surgery in a few weeks and I’m not supposed to wear my contacts. The question is — where did my glasses go?

Our vacation was in a VRBO beachy house in Summerland, a quaint town near Santa Barbara. We had our daughter and Waffles the pug stay with us for the first weekend and then mid-week our son and his girlfriend joined us.

It was one of the most relaxing and best vacations in recent memory. We walked the beach a few blocks below the house each morning. Each day brought new sights with a combination of fog, clear sunshine, horses, dogs, seals and dolphins. After the morning walk, my husband and I’d log onto our laptops for a few hours work. Then back to another beach for hours sitting under an umbrella, watching the waves and reading. We’d end the beach day with another walk with our feet in the cool ocean water. What we found so surprising was practically vacant beaches in August — in So Cal!

Dinners we shared with friends and the kids. We know several great couples who live in the area and we laughed through great meals and memories, like grilled fresh ahi, a delicious Italian restaurant and a make-your-own pizza night. For the kids, I cooked prime steaks, salads and their favorite veggies, using my tried and true reverse sear method I found on youtube.

IMG_1493

The beachy VRBO.

I was resigned that the wonderful vacation must come to an end. What I wasn’t prepared for was losing my glasses. The last time I wore them was at our friend’s house and I packed my small handbag with contacts and glasses — I’m sure.

The next few weeks will be interesting, because without contact lenses, I cannot drive. I’m literally going to be housebound until my cataract surgery — except if my friend takes me to Masters swimming and I can manage to swim blind.

My contact lenses change the curvature of my eyes, so I have to let my eyeballs rest and return to normal. I scrounged up an old pair of glasses at least five years old and scratched as heck. But it’s better than nothing, I guess. I plan on taking my morning walks, and continue on with my writing, although at a slower speed and most likely more typos — since I can’t see worth beans. In the long run it will be worth it. But, where did my glasses go?

IMG_4201

Waffles on a beach run.

My girlfriend has searched her house on her hands and knees. I have done the same in my own house. I’ve gone through trash, laundry, drawers, suitcases, bags, under beds, and throughout the car and trunk. Of course, I blame my missing glasses on my husband — but that’s a story for another time. Just when I need my glasses the most, poof! They’re gone!

I’ll let you know if they turn up and where they disappeared to! Any ideas?