Category Archives: Dreaming

Dilemma from a dream

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Olive cat
Olive giving me that look before she jumps in my lap.

I had a weird dream last night. It was short, but got me thinking.

In my dream I was at Costco. I was standing up front where they have electronics. I watched as a young woman in her 20s, got a display camera unattached and put it under her arm and walked towards the exit.

I pointed at her and yelled to a nearby employee “She’s taking a camera.”

The employee ran after her.

Another employee came up to me and told me to mind my own business. “She’s not hurting you or anybody else,” he scolded me.

“Yes, she is. It’s wrong to steal and it makes everything cost more for us,” I answered.

“Costco can afford it. Besides they have insurance for theft.”

Then I woke up.

I wondered about it.The dream me did what I feel is right. Would the awake and out of bed me do the same if I was standing in a store watching someone shoplift?

My son’s first job in San Francisco was with a retailer he worked part time for during his college days. He got robbed and was instructed to let the shoplifters take the clothing. This was one of those stories where my husband told my son, “Don’t tell mom. She doesn’t need to know.” There’s been a few of them and guess what? Mom (me) always finds out.

What would you do if you witnessed a robbery or shoplifting? Would you report it, let it go, or get involved another way?

What I’m excited about

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cactus bloom
A cactus in bloom in my yard.

After taking time off from submitting stories, I finally did it. I dusted off the story I wrote about my mom and submitted to two publishers who accept unsolicited manuscripts. Two so far.

It made me really happy to do that. The process has changed through the years. I used to mail my printed manuscript with a query letter and an SASE (Self Addressed Stamped Envelope.) Then I’d anxiously await for the publisher or agent to reply by snail mail. If I was lucky, I’d get a letter that was encouraging. Or, in the case of a novel, I’d send in the first three chapters and the editor would ask for more. I even got a few acceptance letters from magazines and newspapers.

The funniest thing was I did get an offer to publish my “mom” story. At the time, I didn’t think the offer was good enough. It was from a small publisher who said they’d do an initial run of 500 or 1,000 and see how it did before another print run. How I wish I would have said yes! That’s why I’m excited to try again, all these years later.

On the down side of submitting manuscripts, I’d get a form letter or postcard in my SASE with a generic phrase, “We’re sorry but your manuscript doesn’t fit our needs.”

Now, we submit by email or through a form on the publisher’s website. They have submission guidelines and say if you don’t hear back in so many months, they aren’t interested. You’re not guaranteed to get a response.

Doing more research on publishers, I renewed my membership in the Society of Children’s Book Writers and Illustrators (SCBWI). I downloaded the market survey for small presses and discovered quite a few still use the old snail mail method with SASEs. I bet that cuts down on the number of submissions!

I received an email from one of the two publishers so far and it stated they are interested in my story and will give it careful consideration. I guess I passed the first hurdle. But, the email ended with “if you don’t hear back from us within two months, then we are passing on your manuscript.”

Eh, wait and see. In the meantime, I’m pleased to be back in the game.

What are your thoughts about submitting your writing?

When you dream about your pets

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My kids with our yellow lab Angus. We adopted Angus from Guide Dogs when he was seven months old and wasn’t making the cut in the program. He was ours for 15 years.

Have you ever had a dream where your deceased pet is alive? I had one last night. I was on vacation and my golden retriever Pepi was with me. She looked so happy, healthy and her fur was so soft.

I told someone in my dream, “Doesn’t Pepi look good? Can you believe she was born in 1970?”

Next in my dream, I was frantically looking for Natasha, our rottie who died in the late 1990s. I sometimes have dreams with both Natasha and Pepi together. They usually are running and playing in fields ahead of me.

I feel so comforted when I have dreams with my pets, whether it’s Natasha, Pepi or Angus. They are my three dogs who crossed the rainbow bridge. It’s like a gift that I get to spend a little more time with them.

Pepi was in a litter of ten born to our golden retriever Kim — on my birthday — when I was in kindergarten. My dad sold all the puppies but Pepi, who was my childhood dog until she got hit chasing a car while I was away in college.

I found an article called Stories of Visitation Dreams of Deceased Pets: Loving, healing, and uplifting experiences from readers’ dreams on Psychology Today by Preston Ni M.S.B.A.

It offers five characteristics that people report about their dreams of pets. The dreams attest to the animal human connection we share. Here’s the one characteristic that rings true in my dreams:

The deceased pet often appeared young and healthy.

“My girl came to me full of life, love and happiness.”

―Anonymous

“(My dog) was completely healed.”

―Anonymous

In many visitation dreams, the deceased pets appeared not in their afflicted or stricken states toward the end of their lives. Instead, they are young, energetic, and healthy. The pets would play and interact with their owners in the dream.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/communication-success/202010/stories-visitation-dreams-deceased-pets

Do you have dreams that include your pets? Are the pets in your dreams ones you lost years ago? How do you feel when you experience one of these dreams?

Do your ever dream about pets?

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Angus and Sherman visit me in my dreams. Angus lived until 15 and Sherman was 18, RIP.

This might seem weird. But from time to time my RIP pets enter my dreams. I’m so happy to be reunited with them. This happened to me last night. My childhood dog Pepi was there. She was so happy, waving her tail and playing with a ball. I watched her romp around. Pepi was born on my six birthday, one of a litter of 10 golden retriever pups that arrived on my special day.

In my dream, I couldn’t believe how good Pepi looked. I was telling a friend that she was born when I was six. I was trying to figure out how old that would make her, but got stymied after I hit 50 years old. That couldn’t be! Even in my dream, I knew that was way too old for a golden.

Often when my pets visit me in my dreams, I see them from afar, running through a field. I sometimes get to pet them, but mostly they are out of reach.

I wonder what it means when our pets are in our dreams? I googled pets in dreams and one thing stood out to me. Several websites said that dreaming of our own pets means that we are preparing to take care of someone. Interesting, since I’m going to be flying to the Bay Area to take care of my son after his surgery.

kids playing with a Rottie
My kids celebrating Natasha’s birthday. Natasha also appears in my dreams. We had her for 10 years.

What are your thoughts about pets in dreams? Do you ever dream of a pet that’s passed away, or do you dream about a pet that you have now?

4 Ways to Make Your Dreams Come True

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IMG_8956Do you have a secret dream that you’ve been working towards for years? Or, maybe a dream you once had, but never reached? What’s holding you back? Why aren’t you moving forward? Do you feel stuck in your daily grind, with no time to finish that project, or follow your dream?

I’m reading a book that provides a strategy to make dreams come true.

It’s called “From Chump to Champ: How Individuals Go From Good to Great” by David Benzel. He’s an author, athlete and sports family coach. I discovered him on the USA Swimming website. He offers monthly webinars and has written books that are inspirational and helpful.

The Belmont Pool, where many dreams came true.

The Belmont Pool, where many dreams came true.

What I’ve discovered and learned so far from reading this book are the following four tips:

  1. Dream—Be specific about your dream. Like going to Olympic Trials. Please take note as a new Masters swimmer in my 50s, this is not my dream. It’s someone else’s dream, but a good one to use as an example.
  2. Goals—Set steps that you need to take to reach your goal. Say, if you’re a swimmer, and your dream is Olympic Trials, then you have a specific time goal. If you need to drop a second to get your cut, what daily things are you going to do to get there? Cut out junk food? Work on underwaters? Those would be specific goals to reach your dreams.
  3. Visualize—Use the theater of your mind to picture what it will be like getting your Olympic Trials cut. Make a movie in your head and replay it over and over all the way through.
  4. Belief—This is the hardest one for me. Get rid of that pesky voice in your head that tells you you’re not good enough, or your dream is just a dream. “I’m not talented enough to make it to Olympic Trials. Other swimmers are stronger and taller than me.” Change the self-talk to positive. “I’ve worked hard my entire life for this. Nobody works harder than I do.” Reflect on all your accomplishments and the hard work you’ve put in. How you’re setting yourself up for success.

Step #4 is the one that 80 percent of us need to work on. It’s the last stumbling block we need to overcome before realizing our dreams.

Sunset at the beach.

Sunset at the beach.

Can you imagine what it would be like to face life fearlessly every day? Excited to reach your dreams? Carpe Diem! Let’s go for it!

Carpe diem.

Carpe diem. Photo by Debbie Gardiner

Remembering a perfect day for a sail

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I like to look back on what I was doing during the same week on another year. This looks so wonderful. I’d love to be sailing in Santa Barbara this week. Instead I’m sheltering in place and it’s 108 degrees outside in Palm Springs. So, looking back at the photos and videos will have to do. Soon, we’ll be back and on that boat with our good friends, I hope.

On the lookout for Humpback Whales.

On the lookout for Humpback Whales.

Sunday was a perfect day for sailing. I went with my daughter, who’s home from college for a short break, and our friends—who own a sailboat. They live near Santa Barbara, and as an Aussie, Rob sails in and out of his slip at the marina, and the first time I went sailing with them, we were in a regatta. So, he’s very good at sailing.

I’m a fair weather sailor. I like a gentle breeze, sunshine, and no waves. The weather was perfect. We watched as 14-footers raced, brightly-colored spinnakers hoisted, gliding over a glossy sea.

A couple of the 14 footers with spinnakers racing by.

A couple of the 14 footers with spinnakers racing by.

Then, we spotted a dolphin. Then tens of dolphins. Soon the boat was sailing with dolphins leaping all around. Several were playing and cruising along the bow. There were dolphins leaping in all directions, tens upon dozens of them everywhere!

Then they slowed down and turned around.

We watched pelicans and gulls dive into the ocean.

Then–the spray of a whale blowing. The broad humped back, then the tail. WOW! We all yelled together. Soon we spotted whale number two. Then three. We were being treated to a pod of humpback whales.

A whale's tale.

A whale’s tale.

We spent the next several hours on the lookout for whales. After the tail goes straight up the whale dives. It was incredible to hear their loud gasp for air as they filled their lungs with oxygen before their dive. They hold their breath and stay submerged for at at least five to ten minutes. We would wait patiently, scanning the sea for a sign of the blow, and the back breaking the surface.

What a truly amazing day. How sad I was the following day to hear about the oil spill.

Here are more dolphin photos. These are from my friends with the sailboat on a recent sail they had from Santa Barbara to the islands. How I wish I had been there. IMG_4906 IMG_4912

Dolphins having fun with the boat.

Dolphins having fun with the boat.

Two dolphins at the bow. Photo by Debbie Gardiner.

Two dolphins at the bow. Photo by Debbie Gardiner.

Reflections during sunset at the Santa Barbara marina.

Reflections during sunset at the Santa Barbara marina.

Here are the latest photos from my friends from their June sail to “the islands.” Photos by Debbie Gardiner.IMG_4947 IMG_4979 IMG_4961 IMG_4976

How early is too early?

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Morning in the neighborhood at the normal time I walk.

This week, I’m driving my husband to work because he’s recently had shoulder surgery and has not been cleared by his doctor to drive. I am not complaining and have no problem with this at all. I enjoy the 30-minute drive with him to his office. The problem is that his alarm goes off at 3:45 am. Yes, before 4 o’clock in the morning.

Of course, his alarm has gone off at that exact time for years. However, I had mastered the art of putting a pillow over my head, rolling over and ignoring it and the noise he makes getting ready for work. I managed to sleep until the late hour of 6:30 a.m. and sometimes even 7 a.m.

This week, I have said to him, “Wake me up at the last minute before you’re ready to go and I’ll be ready to drive in a few seconds.”

However, knowing that I’ll be leaving the comfort of my bed in the dark, isn’t conducive to falling back to sleep. Instead, after failing to return to my dreams, I give up. I’d rather drive showered, with clean teeth and a freshly washed face than stinky.

The end result is that I’ve been in kind of fog this week. I get back home ready to start my day, but within a few hours, I’m really, really tired. Yesterday I fell asleep at 5 p.m. I sat down to read and nodded right out. It was only a brief nap, but I’ve never been able to nap well before.

Today was much easier to get up and so far I have more energy. Maybe I’ll get used to this new early riser schedule. I wonder how many days it takes to change your internal clock? It makes me think about how tough it is for most kids at the start of a new school year. That’s another reason why we appreciated swimming. Although our children’s summer schedule was not as early as during the school year, they were used to getting to the pool by 7 a.m. all summer long. It wasn’t a stretch to transition back to the school schedule.

I’ve always liked the morning, just not the hours before 5 a.m. But after all, the early bird gets the worm. I can do this! Maybe I’ll be more productive with my work by getting an earlier start. Or, I could swim at 5:30 a.m. Masters like it’s no big deal.

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Sunrise

What time do you get up in the morning? How long has it taken you to get adjusted to a new schedule?