Tag Archives: stress dreams

Stress Dreams

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Sunset view from our neighborhood.

The other night, I dreamt I was at a golf course. There were tons of people I knew from my children’s elementary school. The clubhouse and first tee were packed. I was playing in a charity golf tournament.

I was so excited when I found out who I was paired with. JACK NICKLAUS! WooHoo. We were sure to win. I glanced around at the parents from my kids’ school with a smug look on my face. They looked back at me with shocked expressions.

When I grabbed my brand new driver, the grip was missing. The club was a foot too short and there was no way to hold onto it. There was a line into the pro shop, so I couldn’t get it fixed.

Jack and I waited for our tee time for three hours. Finally, Jack said, “I’m out of here.” FYI, he was really a kind guy and I had fun talking with him 😊

I tried to convince him to stay, but no luck. Then I woke up.

I told my husband about my dream and he said, “That’s a stress dream.”

It it was, it sure was a weird one. I have more common stress dreams. One dream is I signed up for a class in high school or college and forgot about it until finals. I have to take the test without ever going to class or studying.

Other dreams are I’m at a beach up on a hill and a giant wave crashes down on me. Or, I’m being chased by bad guys.

From PsychCentral:

What are stress dreams?

Stress dreams are distressingTrusted Source or anxiety-provoking dreams or nightmares that occur during your REM cycle, which is the stage of sleep when scientists think most dreaming occurs. They can be particularly vivid or recurrent.

While everyone’s dreams can be different, there are a few common types of stress dreams.

“Stress dreams happen to everyone, and, while they can be troubling, they’re not unusual,” explains Dr. Cynthia Briggs, a licensed clinical mental health counselor from Maryland.

What causes stress dreams?

Well, as the name implies, psychological stress is often behind this kind of dream.

After all, stress dreams are particularly common when you’re feeling anxious, stressed, or under pressure during your day-to-day life.

“Our brains are deeply imaginative and creative, and stress dreams are one way our minds process worries overnight,” she continues. “They are the leftover odds and ends we haven’t quite resolved during the daytime.”

Do you experience stress dreams?

Do you have recurring stress dreams? What are they?

Stress that’s entering my dreams

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Carefree Christmas tree
The Christmas tree in our town circle.

The past few nights, I’ve had trouble sleeping. I wake up frequently in the night, tossing and turning and not being able to fall back to sleep for at least an hour.

Then I have stress dreams. I realized that’s what they were when in one dream my best friend showed me a beautiful ring that she had been given by her husband. She showed me the price tag of $4,000. I set it carefully back on her desk — and then it disappeared! I kept looking under the desk, through the desk drawers, all through the room, on the carpet. I kept going back to her with new ideas of where to look. Finally, I forced myself to wake up and realized it was a dream.

I have similar dreams where I can’t find something. In one I had two nights in a row, I was looking for a friend chicken place but couldn’t remember the name. I typed in In-N-Out on google maps to get directions to the chicken place. Only in a dream right? It had me driving for hours trying to find the restaurant.

I think it’s the pressure of Christmas vacation coming up including the nine-hour drive we’ll take this week. I absolutely hate driving and I have high anxiety over long car rides. Then there’s the worry that our family will all make it to the house we rented where we’re going to spend the week. The kids and girlfriend’s family are all driving from the Bay Area to Santa Barbara.

Then I worry about getting into the Airbnb house and also worry that the owner ripped us off and I’ve got 12 people to house for Christmas.

Once we make the drive and get settled, I’m sure this anxiety will leave. It helps a bit to write about it, too. The absurdity of my worries and dreams are exposed.

For example, my son’s car is in the shop and I worried about how he and his girlfriend would make it for Christmas. I started googling everything from Amtrak, flights and Greyhound.

I asked my daughter how they were getting down to Santa Barbara. She said “We had a group chat last night and the nine of us have it all figured out.” Of course. They are all adults. They don’t need mommy to fix it. One worry off my list.

Do you think stress is common over the holidays? Or is it a result of being isolated for so long that makes it more stressful this year to gather — and the news of COVID spiking?