Category Archives: Elderly

Hazy Shade of Winter

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This is a pen and ink drawing I made of my home I lived in from second grade until I went to college. I took several art classes for the fun of it in college. I gave this to my mom, who had to sell the house after she and dad divorced. She couldn’t afford to live there on her own. When she moved into assisted living years ago, my brother mailed it to me along with a box of her journals and photo albums.

My dad was visiting our house in Palm Springs when the box arrived and we went through it together. He grabbed this framed sketch of mine and it’s been hanging on a wall of his home ever since. Ever since this past weekend that is — we moved him into assisted living. I told him I was taking it back. In fact, I wasn’t happy when he took it, because I didn’t give him permission. But I realized someday I would get it back, rather than make a stink over it.

He had it on a wall that got lots of sun and it is badly faded. I scanned it and used Adobe Camera Raw to get some life back into it.

Do I have a funny story about an art class in college! In addition to art, I took ballet. I was taking a drawing class and we were introduced to sketching nudes. Was I surprised when a male model was a fellow dancer from my ballet class! Did I turn red when he walked over to me during a 10-minute break stark naked and wanted to chat. I think I ran out of the room!

Here are a few other photos I scanned from “back in the day”:

A view of the Snohomish valley from our living room window.

A view from a living room window looking towards the road going down the hill. We lived on Lord’s Hill, Snohomish, Washington.

Our dog Hondo. I couldn’t find the photos of Hondo in our International Tractor trailer. I learned how to drive on the tractor and loved to carry Hondo along. Funny, I just showed those photos to my husband, which is most likely why I can’t find them.

Me and mom in matching dresses she sewed. I had a closet of more than 30 dresses that she whipped up for me. I wanted to wear jeans…

Nothing like putting a thick pair of glasses on a girl to turn her into an introvert. Oh well, I had my books as friends.

Contact lenses changed my life!

This looking back in time reminded me of a Simon and Garfunkel song:

Time, time, time
See what’s become of me

Time, time, time
See what’s become of me
While I looked around for my possibilities

I was so hard to please
Look around
Leaves are brown
And the sky is a hazy shade of winter

Have a wonderful weekend! Any big plans for the weekend or Christmas?

Happy Friday!

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I have never seen this cactus bloom before, let alone in August! Must have been our recent monsoon.

I’m wondering what happened with the week? It rushed by. Usually the dog days of summer in the desert are slow to pass. But not this week.

What was I up to this week?

On the weekend, we made dinner for newish friends of ours. We cooked an all American meal of ribs (my husband), potato salad, corn on the cob and cherry pie (me.) We met these friends at the funeral of our friend who introduced me to my husband 40 years ago. He died suddenly from Valley Fever after we moved to Arizona. Our friends we had over for dinner were his brother and wife who moved to Arizona from Seattle. A circle of new friends all bought homes in Arizona, including us and another couple from Kirkland, because of this one friend. We’ve all pledged to keep his memory alive and get together several times a year.

The next busy moments came Monday morning meeting to brainstorm with my newsletter co-hort to write and layout the quarterly HOA newsletter. I’m proud to say that after 30-plus years of “newslettering,” I returned to my roots. We initiated a new process this issue that worked and the President of the HOA approved.

I compiled all the copy in a word document and sent it to the board to approve — prior to spending hours laying it out. This was similar to my early PR days, before desktop publishing and Mac computers. I would drive copy to the typesetter and then get it approved before giving copy to graphic designers to layout. Or, do the layout myself.

This is saved me countless revisions. It was annoying to have the newsletter all ready to go, and then have five board members give their two cents worth on what to change — one by one.

Other than the newsletter, which took up most of Monday and Tuesday, I had my first hair appointment since April. My hairdresser, who I love, went on maternity leave and it wasn’t worth it to me to try someone new for a one off appointment. It was fun to learn how my hairdresser is totally amazed and feels blessed with motherhood. She wasn’t expecting the dramatic love and emotions she’s experiencing now.

Thursday was a doctor’s appointment for my husband that I drove to. It was his final cataract appointment. He has new-fangled lenses that can be adjusted post-surgery with a laser light. It meant four or five extra appointments, but it’s supposed to make vision sharper.

Now that it’s Friday, we’re meeting friends who moved here from Palm Springs for dinner. But I have the day free to relax, read and comment on posts. I might visit the library, too.

I feel like one of my husband’s older clients from decades ago. My husband would call them to come into his office for an appointment. Often they’d respond, “Oh I can’t make it Wednesday. I have a doctor’s appointment.” Those were the days I was volunteering at school, taking kids to piano lessons, packing lunches, making dinners and volunteering at swim meets. I always wondered why people thought they were busy doing one “main thing” a day. Now I know!

How did your week go? Did it flash by quickly or seem slow?

What were some highlights of the week?

Scams, scams and more scams

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Every single day I get emails like the one above. Plus, I get texts from “UPS” or other delivery services that say they can’t deliver my package. It’s being held until I make a payment.

Of course, I don’t fall for them. But I wonder how many people do? Especially senior citizens, our youth or naive.

When I get the daily half dozen fake PayPal emails I forward them. Here are the instructions from PayPal — the real PayPal.

Phishing email/message

Received a suspicious email, or message or been directed to a fake website? Forward it to phishing@paypal.com and then delete it. We’ll investigate it for you.

Don’t reply, open links, download attachments, or call any listed phone number.

https://www.paypal.com/us/cshelp/article/what-are-common-scams-and-how-do-i-spot-them—help201

My friend in Santa Barbara does lots of errands for her next door neighbor who is older and has sight issues. My friend began to worry when she’d take her mail to the post office and realized she was mailing out dozens of letters each day addressed to sweepstakes. She discovered her elderly neighbor was mailing dollar bills to “win prizes.” She called the neighbor’s daughter who lives in another state and they finally put a stop to it. She would pick up the letters and pretend to mail them, but hold onto them, eventually returning the money.

Another scam I heard about happened during my daughter’s last year in college. One of her friends, who is book smart and was high school valedictorian, got a phone call from the “IRS.” He was instructed to buy Apple gift cards and mail them to an address that was supposedly the government agency.

He emptied out his college account, which had his last semester’s tuition of $1,200 and bought gift cards at the local grocery store. (Yes, he had several scholarships is why his tuition bill was so low.)

The cashier questioned him but he insisted on buying the cards. Then he mailed them.

You can only imagine the teasing he received from his college mates after that! Today this young man is a doctor. Yikes.

What scams do you see in your inbox? Have you heard of any other ones I didn’t mention? Are you worried AI will lead to more scams?

Early birds

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House finch enjoying birdseed at my Bird Buddy.

The early birds I’m talking about aren’t these gorgeous creatures in my backyard. I’m talking about me and my hubby.

We’ve become the couple we used to laugh at. You know, the ones who have dinner at 4:30 or 5 p.m. to save money. Now, when we go out, we go early to take advantage of early bird prices that end at 6 p.m. Only these days, it’s no longer called “early bird specials” but “happy hour.”

A neighborhood couple invited us to dinner for restaurant week that features three-course meals at reduced prices. We declined because their reservation was too late for us! It was at the wee hour at night of 6:30 p.m. To be fair, my husband works in the financial world and he’s on east coast time. His work day begins three hours earlier than most people out west.

This is the state bird of Arizona, the cactus wren.

It’s gotten hotter the past couple weeks. I began setting my alarm so that I’m up before sunrise. We’ve changed our walking schedule to avoid the heat. We are heading out the door before 6 a.m. — which also makes us early birds.

One of our neighbors told us her method for walking. (Who knew you needed a method?) She turns right out of her driveway and continues to walk on the right side of the road. By doing that, she said she hits every road and cul-de-sac in the neighborhood — and ends back at her front door. My husband and I have been random walkers, going whichever way our whims take us. But this week, we tried it and not only does it add a little distance to our walk, we’re seeing streets we were previously missing.

I wrote about successful people who are early birds HERE.

What are your thoughts about early bird specials and getting up early?

A video of a juvenile Cardinal.

Apprehension alert

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road to our property in Washington state
The private road to our property in Washington.

The time has come. I’m traveling to Washington state to be with family and celebrate my mom’s life. She passed away from asymptomatic COVID on New Year’s Day.

My brother and I were grieving badly along with our aunt, Mom’s little sister, and we decided to wait until her birthday to spread her ashes and to be together to celebrate her life. I thought a little time would help me face the loss. I don’t know if it made it better or worse.

The trip has been hanging over my head since the first week of January. Now that it’s here, I’m feeling waves of grief and untapped emotion.

The photos are from property that has been in the family for three generations. This is where we’ll say good-bye to mom.

Property in WA
Our property on the Stilaguamish River.
Mom fishing in the river.
Mom trout fishing in the river when I was up for a visit from California years ago.

An atmospheric river

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Weather alert on iphone

I’m visiting my mom in the Pacific Northwest. This is what my phone blasted to me on my first morning when I woke up.

I’ve never seen a hydrologic outlook on my phone, nor an atmospheric river.

I’m staying with my BFF from college and I asked her what it meant.

She said, “Oh I hate this. It’s a huge amount of rain and flooding.”

I pictured the atmospheric river as a massive body of water running through the clouds above my head.

My friend also told me that she thinks the weather forecasters and meteorologists work too hard to find new terms for long-occurring events.

Here’s the rest of the alert I received:

Severe Weather Alert on iphone

I was pleasantly surprised to have cloudy skies with blue peeking through. It’s absolutely gorgeous here and such a contrast from the desert of Arizona. I love spending time with my mom, although she’s not doing as well as during my last visit. More on that after I have time to process my thoughts and emotions.

tree line lane in Redmond WA

The drive to my mom’s assisted living.

blue skies in WA in November

I loved the light in the leaves of this tree at my mom’s assisted living.

What strange weather alerts have you seen? Have you heard of hydrologic events or atmospheric rivers before?

Retirees sue ASU dive bar

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saguaro in the Sonoran Desert
Saguaro in the Sonoran Desert

I like the concept of senior citizens living on campus with students. I learned about an apartment complex at the Arizona State University campus in Tempe in an article in the Wall Street Journal called “Who Let Retirees Move on Campus at Arizona State?” by James Fanelli.

It caught my eye since we live about 45 minutes from the campus.

From the article:

Senior citizens who moved into a pricey housing complex at ASU, once named America’s No. 1 party school, want more quiet, less loud music

Housing at Mirabella requires one-time fees that go from $440,000 to more than $1 million. Residents pay another $4,000 to $8,000 a month, which includes classes and meals.

Mirabella also is restricted to seniors. Residents must be 62 or older. It is one of the country’s few senior-living facilities set on a college campus, mixing older and younger generations by design. It hasn’t gone as well as hoped.

For the kind of money Mirabella’s 260 residents are paying, some are asking why they can’t get a little peace and quiet.

Some have complained about music that blasts late into the night. The vibration of bass notes has rattled the windows and walls of Sharon Murry’s apartment at all hours, the 72-year-old said. “That unrelenting bass thumping sound makes it difficult to concentrate or do anything else,” including sleep, she said in a court filing.

https://www.wsj.com/articles/who-let-retirees-move-on-campus-at-arizona-state-11665583186?mod=lifework_trending_now_article_pos4

Like I said, I think the concept of living on campus and being able to take whatever classes you want would be an amazing experience as a senior citizen. But the noise of a dive bar across the street blasting EDM until the wee hours of the morning would be too much.

I should know. Our old house was across from what used to be a health retreat for middle-aged women (once called a fat farm). It sold to a hotelier who wanted to turn it into a resort with live outdoor concerts. Our windows shook. My kids would lose sleep on school nights. It was a nightmare. We went to the county courthouse because I found a law that said we were entitled to the peaceful enjoyment of our home. The liquor license got restricted and if we could hear the music in our house, they would get fined. So many fines and their license would get revoked.

However, this case is different than the hotel across the street from our old home. The senior citizens of Mirabella knowingly moved on to the kids’ territory. The judge is trying to work out a compromise.

What are your thoughts? Should the old folks have a right to demand peace and quiet on a college campus?