This is my family with our daughter-in-law’s family during a Christmas week vacation together in Santa Barbara during a prior year. We were only missing one sister, Maggie, who was at grad school at Cambridge.
I’m sharing wonderful news. My son and daughter-in-law called on their way home from the oncologist. Buff had her first scan since her six-months of chemo ended without major problems and side effects.
Buff has a clean bill of health and feels terrific!
She will receive scans every three months for the next two years, then every six months for the following three years.
It’s been a worrisome, stressful time since Buff’s initial diagnosis of Stage 3C colon cancer, surgery and chemo. I feel relief like our entire family has turned the corner — because our daughter-in-law Buff is doing so well. Hopefully, the newlyweds will have clear sailing from now on throughout their future. I wrote about the day of her surgery HERE.
I’d like to hear more good news! What good news do you have to share?
Ave Maria was played Christmas night by two of Buff’s sisters, Allie and Christy, during the vacation in the photo above. They’re both professional musicians. I’m so grateful to have enjoyed their private concerts and I hope there are many more to come!
Photo from my son and daughter-in-law’s wedding day.
It’s been a long six months, but Monday was the final treatment day for my daughter-in-law. Every two weeks, my son has driven her over the bridge to UCSF for chemo.
I’ll never forget the worry I felt during her surgery. We were on vacation at the time. They were supposed to spend a week with us in Santa Barbara at the beach when they found out she had cancer was was having surgery immediately. I wrote about surgery day HERE. The linked post includes a beautiful poem by my DIL after she met my son at UCSB.
Every day I pray for my DIL and my son. Over the weekend, they were moving into an apartment and my son hit his head. He hit it badly. I was in shock when my daughter called me from the ER.
He’s now down with a really bad concussion. Seriously? Do they need this now?
Have you noticed how life interrupts life just when you think it’s getting better?
What are your thoughts about how quickly this last six months went by?
I woke up Sunday morning feeling off. There are a bunch of things on my mind.
First, my daughter-in-law who was approved for disability until the end of March, was cut off from it out of the blue. Now my son and DIL have to fight the system to get it reinstated.
Next, she was informed by her job through email that they are exploring termination because her 12 weeks of leave through the Family and Medical Leave Act has ended. I don’t think that is legal, because cancer is protected under ADA. The doctor gave her leave of absence until her chemo treatments are done.
It’s so frustrating to me that they have this added stress. It’s unnecessary and wrong and they shouldn’t have to deal with these issues while she’s undergoing her last few months of chemo.
We had a house guest over the weekend. He was a childhood friend of my husband’s and they were roommates when we first got together. I thought he was staying with us for a few days, but he left early Sunday morning after arriving the afternoon before.
Finally, we have a tenant who hasn’t paid rent and it was due January 1. He’s strung my husband along with excuses and promises to pay and finally admitted yesterday morning that he doesn’t have the money. This is the same house where we had problems — with possible illegal activity. I wrote about it HERE.
I was so looking forward to my kids’ visit. Now that they are gone, I’m in a bit of a funk. I figured it out when I don’t want to eat. I don’t want to leave the house for my morning walks. I can tell my husband is a little worried about me.
Unfortunately when my two adult kids, new bride and her brother were here, things didn’t go exactly as planned. We had a heat wave and since they all live in the Bay Area, the heat doesn’t agree with them. Then the AC went out their last night in the casita and DIL got very sick.
And I got scared!
She vomited for hours. They finally decided to pack up and leave. Once she was in the AC of the car, she felt much better. I worried about her health unlike anything I’ve felt before. I realized how vulnerable she is. How vulnerable we all are.
I’m trying to leave Funkytown. We’re headed on a weekend getaway to Mexico, which is a four-hour drive away. The beach always makes me feel better. In the meantime, I have a community newsletter to complete and will keep moving.
Sunday, I was getting the house ready for guests. As I was cleaning out my paperwork and assorted crap I squirreled away in drawers and cupboards in the Casita, I thought about what fun things we could do with our guests without leaving home.
Our guests asked us to quarantine starting today before their arrival. Would you quarantine for upcoming guests?
You would if it was our guests — my son and his bride. Also, our daughter and Buff’s brother, to help with the drive (who are in the quarantine pod.) They will be here between chemo infusions, if they get the okay from her doctor after a blood test to determine her immunity level.
In case you missed the story of their wedding and cancer diagnosis, you can read it HERE.
I looked outside and glanced at the fireplace. Now that the weather is a bit cooler at night, I envisioned us sitting around the fireplace. Then my mind raced to marshmallows and s’mores!
Whatever happened to the telescopic marshmallow roasting sticks we bought 20 years ago? Did they make the move from California to Arizona?
The last time I remembered seeing them was in photos camping at Carpinteria State Beach when the kids were young. AND on our RV.
I had a light-blue, rectangular plastic storage box with camping kitchen necessities, including matches, that I pictured in my mind. That’s where they were. I’d bet on it. That box made it from tent days to RV days, to somewhere in our garage, unless it got thrown out when we moved.
If you want to read about our lack of RV skills, please read my story about our mishaps HERE. We were NOT happy campers.
In the garage I found a cardboard bankers box that said RV on the side. I unpacked it and found plastic plates, bowls and glasses that will be perfect poolside in our backyard. Next, I found the plastic storage box with more goodies like the matches, spices, knives, a can and wine opener and our red-and-white checked tablecloth.
No marshmallow roasters.
Before I turned to Amazon for help, I got the brilliant idea to look in my kitchen drawers. Voila! I have two out of the four. I must have given my kids the other two because they both loved camping during college and the shut down.
I found two out of four marshmallow roasters I bought 20 years ago. We will be s’more ready and can enjoy evenings in the backyard, without leaving the house.
What are your thoughts about camping? Are you a tent person or an RVer and why?
Do you think my quest for 20-year-marshmallow roasters is quest for memories past and easier times?
After ten years of being with the love of his life, our son made the big step called commitment.
The risk of losing Buff was right before his eyes. She was diagnosed with colon cancer and was facing surgery. They decided to get married before surgery.
We were on vacation in Santa Barbara. They had originally taken time off work to spend a week with us.
The wedding was scheduled in Berkeley at the courthouse. No way were we going to miss it. We booked flights from Santa Barbara to Oakland. The day before their wedding we got one of many calls.
“We both tested positive for COVID,” our son said.
Surgery was scheduled 10 days out, so thankfully Buff’s surgery wasn’t delayed. In the meantime, our son ended up in ER with COVID.
Surgery turned out much better than we anticipated. Big sigh of relief. I wrote about those days HERE and HERE. They said the longer the surgery took, the better the outcome. I was literally praying hour by hour. It was more than six hours, which was the best outcome possible.
Post surgery, they waited one week for pathology reports. We were sure everything was fine because surgery went so well.
My son called us — trying not to break down — that pathology was not good. Stage 3 C, which is a step up or down from Stage 4 (depending on how you look at it.) She has a 40% chance of being cured. Don’t want to talk about the 60%.
They had a window between surgery and chemo to get married. They kept the wedding small outside the Mendocino County Courthouse with their “pod.” We stayed home and I was weepy during their marriage. The next day I was filled with love and hope for them.
They got married with some of Buff’s family, our daughter and a few of their closest friends.
California-style, they had their wedding dinner outside at In-N-Out.
They spent their wedding night in Medocino County in a gorgeous VRBO on a river.
