lazy | bleuwater

swimming pool in Palm Springs — The 50-meter pool in Palm Springs that was one mile from our old house.

I have a reservation to swim in an hour. I don’t feel like going. I swam two days ago and I felt wonderful during and after my swim.

But today I’m weighing the idea that I don’t HAVE to go. If I decide to stay home and read a book in my back yard, I’m not any less of a person. But I’m torn. I feel guilty for not going. I know I should go. I remember I wrote about something similar years ago in a post “I don’t have to, I get to.” It was about appreciating what we have and that we are able to do things.

Every morning I walk, then I either play ping pong or pickleball a few times a week as well as swim. At my age is it okay to slow down and say no thanks, not today? Or should I say “I get to swim today” and just go?

What are your thoughts? What would you do?

saguaro cactus with a full moom — Full moon view from my backyard. The holes in the saguaro are woodpecker nests.

I find myself starting things like my physical therapy, stretching and crunches — and then just as soon as I get a routine going — I stop. It’s such a natural inclination of mine that it takes me weeks to notice.

Why is that? When I know something is good for me, why do I stop it? With New Year’s a week away, is it possible to make some resolutions that I can stick with?

Is it laziness? Forgetfulness? Too busy? What keeps me from doing things that are good for me?

I do have a positive morning routine I’ve followed for years thanks to “The Artist’s Way” by Julia Cameron. I religiously write my three morning pages, go for a walk and pray. I should be thankful that I accomplish those things each day.

Do you find yourself starting and stopping on things, too? What have you started and stuck with? What have you stopped?