Category Archives: Women

“All good things must come to an end”

Posted on by
61

I was looking through my “bird folder” and found a few photos I really liked but didn’t remember taking. They are from April and May. I brightened them up in Adobe Camera Raw and cropped them.

“All Good Things Must Come to and End” is a line attributed to Chaucer, a 14th century English poet. It seems fitting for my life right now.

First, I decided to no longer serve on the board of my women’s group. Then I learned a few weeks ago that the organization is caput. I believe it lasted for more than 30 years and I’ve been involved for about three. I was in charge of communication for membership and for the public, promoting our work and events. The group post COVID had dropped in membership from 200 to 20. Plus a lot of women are getting older. It just wasn’t feasible anymore.

Next, I decided to resign from the HOA newsletter. I worked on the newsletter for four years. I enjoyed it, but a new board was micromanaging and it was no longer a joyful experience.

Does anyone know what type of bird this is? I’ve only seen it once. I’m glad I got a photo.

I had my last photography class last week for the semester. I’ve really enjoyed it and have learned so much. There are five other students who have taken the class for three to nine years. I’m the newbie and this was my first semester. I thought this was going to be an ongoing experience for me. In our last class, I was the last person to present my final project, which I posted HERE.

Then the professor said he had some business to go over. He said the community college may be discontinuing the class. He won’t know for sure until January. So this too may pass.

A Harris’s hawk taking off.

The class is over zoom and there was complete silence when we heard the news. Apparently a student in another one of the professor’s classes was causing trouble for him. He didn’t go into detail, but said the other issue is low attendance. The advanced workshop is by invitation only. It’s not open enrollment. The group is very cohesive and everyone is talented and open to improving and trying new things.

There’s nothing I can do but wait for the New Year and find out if I have a class or not.

Mourning dove landing on the fence.

What good things in your life have come to an end?

I Am Woman Hear Me Roar …

Posted on by
40
images

NOTE: I wrote this blog post 10 years ago this week. It’s a look back to my school days — wedged into a visit with my son and his girlfriend (now wife) while I was visiting them at UC Santa Barbara. Also, there’s a link to my daughter-in-law’s poetry.

During my weekend visit with my son at UCSB, we discovered how far women have come from my generation to his. (Yes, I’m talking about the same son that tried to give away the cat on Facebook — read about that HERE. And, he’s the one that wrote about his crazy mom for his senior project — read about that HERE)

We were out to dinner at The Palms in Carpinteria, where you grill your own steaks or halibut, with one of my best friends, my son Robert, and his girlfriend (She’s a poet and an CCS English Lit major. You can read some of her poetry HERE).

imgres

My friend and I talked about home ec, and we wondered if it was offered as a major in this day and age? My mom was a home ec major in the 1950s, by the way.

My son said, “They really DID have an MRS degree!”

“Not only was it a college major,” I said, “but we were required to take home ec in high school.”

“Only the girls, that is,” my friend said.

“WHAT?!” both Robert and his girlfriend were horrified. How alien to their lives is a gender-based school requirement. We explained that the boys took wood-working or shop.

My son thought for minute and asked, “What did you learn in home ec?”

imgres-4

P1017847

“Scrambled eggs, sewing an apron, sex ed, how to clip coupons and general household budgeting,” I answered.

“All of those things should be taught to men and women,” the kids said.  

I think they are right.

Thinking of those days, made me remember Helen Reddy, and her song, “I Am Woman” 

imgres-5

Do colleges or high schools still offer home ec?

Do you think home ec should be required for both men and women?

What other life skills do you think need to be taught in school?

Thoughts about women’s athletics

Posted on by
13
women's swimming meet poster
My daughter featured on a women’s swimming meet poster for her University.

You’ve all heard about the controversy swirling around transgender Lia Thomas winning events at the Ivy League and NCAA championships.

First, as Kaitlyn Jenner said, Thomas isn’t breaking any rules — she followed NCAA stated rules. Jenner also said it’s not fair for someone who went through male puberty to compete against women. They are taller and stronger. They have bigger hearts, lungs, feet and hands. Those things don’t change with hormone suppression.

The swimmer who got bumped out of finals by one place (she was 17th and there are only 16 spots) wrote a letter to the NCAA. She’s supportive of Thomas but thinks the NCAA rules are not fair. I read she was banned from Twitter for expressing her opinion.

I know several women swimmers who competed against Thomas at the Ivy League champs and NCAAs. I watched them when they were young race against my daughter. The woman who got second place at the Ivy Leagues Champs to Lia Thomas in the 1,650 (the mile) used to race my daughter in So Cal. She was younger and would be in the lane next to my daughter, drafting at her hip. My daughter couldn’t shake her but would touch her out in the end and say “Who is that?!”

I feel for this young woman who lost the title of Ivy League Champion. I wonder how her parents feel?

Prior to 1972 and Title IX, there were few opportunities for women in college sports. Since then, we’ve taken women’s athletics for granted. Yet 50 years ago, most colleges didn’t have women’s sports.

I’ve interviewed swimming stars and coaches for my website socalswimhistory. One story is about Bonnie Adair, the Loyola Marymount head swim coach who as a swimmer held 35 National Age Group records. She talked about when she was college age and there weren’t many teams for women swimmers.

Her freshman year of college was pre-Title IX, and there were limited opportunities and college programs for women. She was training with Jim Montrella for the ’72 Olympic Trials and didn’t want to change up her training regime, so her freshman year she was a commuter at UC Irvine and lived at home with her parents. She said during those days she swam 11 practices a week and lifted weights. 

Looking back, she said it was unfair that the women stayed at home and didn’t get to experience college life.

“All of a sudden when school began, there would be all girls in our training group. The fast guys went off to swim at UCLA and USC. We were freshmen and sophomores in college, and we stayed with our club team to train. We lost that experience of being a freshman away at college.”

https://socalswimhistory.com/2017/02/03/bonnie-adair-held-35-national-age-group-records/

Prior to the 1984 Olympics in Los Angeles, women weren’t allowed to compete in the marathon.

When I was in high school, one of my friends and I joined the Boys Golf Team because there wasn’t a girls team. We went to practice every day, but we never once got to compete in a match. We were not the worst players, either.

My daughter and her friends who swam, put in years of hard work and sacrifice beginning at age five. They benefitted so much from swimming and being part of a team. I’m glad my daughter had that experience. I hope that other women get the same experience, too.

What are your thoughts on women’s sports? Did you know how limited the opportunities were 50 years ago? What are your experiences with women’s sports as a mom or competitor?

If You Can’t Say Anything Nice…

Posted on by
16
USA Swimming Select Camp
My daughter at a Select Camp in Florida with USA Swimming. Yoga on the beach. 24 were selected from the US to attend via certain criteria. She’s on the left with long red hair looking down.

When my daughter was in high school she was bullied by a few girls on her swim team. It seemed to me the better she got, the worse these girls treated her.

Once, one of her friends overhead her teammates cursing and talking about my daughter in class. You can read more about that and earthquakes in “When Kids Talk Trash About Your Daughter and You’re in an Earthquake Kind of Mood.”

Should the close friend, who overheard this garbage, have shared it with my daughter? Maybe it would have been better for my daughter to not hear it.

Or, is it better for her to know the truth? Even if it hurts?

Were her friends being kind by telling her? Or were they just as mean as the one that originally said it?

Should the friend have kept her mouth shut?

And about those people who talk trash about others… If you’re tweeting, posting or saying something mean and unkind, it’s bullying. Knock it off. Find something useful to do. Remember the old adage, “If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all.”

What are your thoughts?

(FYI, I found this in my drafts folder from years ago. I still don’t have the answers to my questions.)

 

 

How do you not “overwork” from home?

Posted on by
Reply

robahh 1

Back when I was working from home as a stay-at-home mom with my first-born child.

Working from home is something I’ve done for years. At first, I had what is now our guest room dedicated as my office for my sole proprietor public relations and marketing biz. That’s why the kids called it the “computer room” when they were little.  I had a desktop Apple IIc something computer and heavy-weight laser printer. Back then, I also had a fax machine and a separate phone line for my work.

images-11

This looks like the very first Mac in my home office.

My downfall with that venture was not knowing when to stop. Even though I had a separate work space, I couldn’t stop working. I had a client who loved to call me after 6 p.m. and give me work that had to be done by morning — and they were my main client! Also, this was pre-email days and internet. I had to transfer files to the people who changed my files to film over a modem. Then the film had to be picked up from these mom and pop shops and I drove them to the printer. I’m talking newsletters, flyers, brochures and veloxes for newspapers. Can you imagine that?

I’d wake up throughout the night and to make sure the files transferred from my modem to the film person’s modem. Sometimes a newsletter or ad file would take six or seven hours to transfer.

How things have changed from the early 1990s! Prior to that it, was a Selectric IBM typewriter I used and hand delivered copy to a print shop who then had to retype it all into columns, lay it out with my photos or artwork, give me a rough copy and finally a blueline to proof before going to print. Things are so much easier these days.

I’m still working from home and everything is so much quicker and convenient with emails and the internet. But the question still remains, how do I guard my time and not work all the time?

What’s a blueline you might ask if you weren’t alive back in the olden days? Here’s the definition I got from googling it from Dictionary.com:

blueline

[ bloo-lahyn ]SHOW IPA

nounPrinting.

a print made on light-sensitive paper and used as a proof for checking the position of stripped-up negatives or positives and copy prior to platemaking.
images-5
What are your solutions for separating a life from working hours when you work from home?

 

6 Tough Questions for Writers

Posted on by
Reply

IMG_1569-1

I write a lot about these two characters.

Have you heard of Authors.me? It’s a website for submissions where writers, agents, editors, publishers and new media can meet. I used it for the first time today and one of the first things I had to do was fill out a personal profile.

I started a new project yesterday that I’m really excited about. I’ll go more into depth about it at a later date. One of the agents I want to pitch my idea to, asks writers to submit their project through Authors.me website. It’s touted as “Your Story’s Future” and a “Smart, effective submissions and acquisitions management.”

I’m super energized about my new project, but filling out the profile surprised me. Here are some of the questions they asked:

Your writing is influenced by experience and personality. Tell your audience what you are made of.

Biography Write your bio as if you are a character in a book. Your life experiences are what make you and interesting person.

Writing Style Show some flare and tell us about your unique writing style.

What makes you special as a writer? More than just style, what makes you unique as a writer could be a lot of factors. Tell us.

Who or what inspires you to write? Show us you can not only inspire others, but that you can be inspired yourself.

What constitutes a great novel? There is no wrong answer, just something that moves you. Tell us.

What is your favorite part about the writing process?

I had fun with the first one–writing my bio as if I were a character in a book. (However I noticed a typo on their first question. Can you find it?) The most important things in my life, whether it’s people or events, became clear by answering this question. I recommend trying it yourself. The exercise asks you to limit the writing to 2000 characters or less. I managed to do that in less which was about 250 words. Even if you’re not a writer, it’s a fun exercise to try.

As for the second request, “Writing Style–Show some flare and tell us about your unique writing style,” I thought was a little strange. Am I supposed to show off or show some flare in my writing about my writing style? Can’t the people looking at my work get a “feel” for my style? I’m not much of a show off and I don’t know how to “flare” my writing about my writing. Plain weird. Also, the opening statement “Tell your audience what you are made of” seems a little over-the-top.

 

I write about Waffles
Olive Bear is now an indoor cat.

 

If you’ve used Author.me, I’d like to know what you think about it. Also, what do you think about these questions?

 

Good News Four Weeks Out: Hey, It’s Not That Bad!

Posted on by
4

 

IMG_0146

This view makes it okay.

 

The breakthrough news one month after surgery is I can hobble around the house and I get to ditch the crutches or walker! This may not sound like a big deal, but truly it’s  major to me right now. Mostly, I’ve been icing and elevating my leg and my few trips out in the world have been to my amazing PT and doctor. I did manage two lunches out with my dad, daughter and dear friend. That’s two lunches in four weeks, mind you.

Not that my home isn’t a perfectly lovely place to be housebound. I feel blessed every morning looking out at the mountain, palm trees, sunshine and citrus trees. But for the past four weeks, I’ve been bouncing between my bed, sofa and chaise lounge by the pool. (Well, maybe not exactly bouncing.) It’s gotten so hot the past two weeks, that I can’t sit in our backyard after 9 a.m. so that’s taken away one-third of my world.

Without crutches, I can actually carry my book, phone, water bottle—or anything else for that matter! The first two weeks, I had to wait for someone to bring me what I wanted. Then, after much teasing and joking by my husband, he suggested I rig up a bag to hang around my neck or walker. I laughed at the thought, but it actually worked!

Now, I’m free as a bird–a bird without wings and one broken leg. The doctor said I still must use crutches if I leave the house. But, I can’t tell you how much I’m going to enjoy carrying items in my hands while I walk around the house!

 

IMG_0142

I can’t wait to get back in the pool!

Even better news, I asked if I could return to the city pool. I want to walk once again in the handicapped lane at the shallow end of the pool using the steps and hanging onto the edge. The doctor said, “YES!” Oh boy! I’m through the worst of this adventure, I can feel it in my bones.

 

What have I been doing laying around post surgery? Not much. I’ve struggled to write because my leg aches and gets stiff after sitting for 30 minutes. I’ve done a little, but not as much as I wish. I have been reading and discovered some great books.

Here are five books I’ve read since surgery that I highly recommend:

Ann Patchett:
Taft
The Magician’s Assistant

Liane Moriarty:
What Alice Forgot
Big, Little, Lies (thank you, Linda, for sharing!)
The Hypnotist’s Love Story

 

 

What good books have you read lately that I might enjoy?