My daughter was going on job interviews and sifting through prospective roommates, when she returned from an appointment to find her home had been ransacked. Frankly, there’s enough change going on in her life these days that she didn’t need her drawers pilfered through and closets emptied onto the floor. She said it was all topsy turvy in each room, including the garage and small storage room.
She found Waffles, her pug, locked in the garage. As the concerned mother I am and wanting to solve all my kids’ problems, I immediately headed to her house — where I still am several days later. By the time I arrived, she had straightened up the house, and together we shopped for a doggie door and security system. A day later, her handyman came and she got dowels in the windows, more security cameras and alarms installed, and she’s no longer leaving the patio door open for Waffles. He has his own door. Now, he just has to learn to use it. (This is proving harder than expected. He scratches at the screens and barks, instead of bolting bravely through.)
I found on this visit to help my daughter out, there wasn’t much for me to do, except to be with her. She needed company and someone in her home so she didn’t feel scared or all alone. She has a dear friend who came over immediately after the burglary and spent the first night until I got here.
Now, my question for myself is — how long do I stay? Do I wait for her to find a new job? A roommate? Feel more settled? Be completely over her fright? Or, is my parenting job over for this moment? I’m planning on heading home soon to pick up the pieces of my life and continue with the work I need to do.
I’m glad to be able to help. But, at some point, Mom can’t be there for them and I need to live my own life. I am kind of torn on this. I enjoy hanging out with both my kids. I worry when things go wrong for them.
When do you think enough parenting is enough?