Stirring the pot without trying


An article I wrote yesterday, which I viewed as non-controversial, got some people stirred up. I wonder if people actually read my words, or if my writing was so far off that I failed to get my intended message to readers.

In any case, I guess it’s good to get comments, although several took me by surprise. I tried to express that we as parents are all different. In my early years as a swim parent and board member, I had expected everyone to be as enthusiastic as I was about being a swim parent and our team. Obviously, there are all sorts of parents and flavors and degrees of interest kids and families have. A few comments I heard from other swim parents years ago took me by surprise. I hadn’t realized how these friends viewed swimming much differently than me.

Throughout the years, we’ve had several head coaches. Some relied heavily on parents involvement and others liked to handle things without parents chipping in. Neither approach is right or wrong. And as parents, we had to figure out what level of our involvement was desired. As the kids got older, we helped out less and less. Yes, we fulfilled our obligations but being a board member or running swim meets no longer was required or desired. We weren’t on deck for every practice anymore but went for long walks during the kids’ practices. Talking to my son, he said he liked it when we were involved. That made me feel appreciated and good about the years we volunteered.

In any case, it was a pleasure and joy to be a swim parent, through the ups and downs. I don’t regret any days of it. I developed so many great friendships that will continue long after our swim parenting days are over.


My daughter, best swim buddy and early coach.

If you’re interested, here’s a link to the article that stirred up so many comments: The Swim Parents I Couldn’t Understand. I’d like to get your feedback on it. too.

2 thoughts on “Stirring the pot without trying

  1. I read that article.
    I️ couldn’t believe number 6! How some parents couldn’t stand to watch their kid swim! That’s so sad to me!!!! 😿

    I️ am the parent that never goes in at practice. I️ have a 3 year old and she’s just too wild and loud to take in, ha!

    • That comment you mentioned is one of my good friends for 20 years. I found it funny we had such a different outlook. But it wasn’t her cup of tea and that’s fine! We used to have a huge group of parents at every practice and now there’s very few, which is probably good for the coaches, kids and team.

      I can’t imagine for you to go to practice with a three-year-old! Also, it’s probably not healthy for any parent to be watching every stroke, every practice. It’s fun to stop by and check it out and see what they’re working on, but not every minute judging how they’re doing.

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