Why is my daughter so annoyed with me?

My kids not wanting me to take their pic.
My kids not wanting me to take their pic.
Mom and me in the early 90s.
Mom and me in the early 90s. I lost her to COVID in January this year.
My baby girl years ago.
A beach day with my daughter.
A beach day with my daughter.

What are your thoughts about adult kids being annoyed with you? Is it deserved or is it growing pains?

Do you think when people close to us are going through rough times, it’s easy for them to take it out on those closest to them?

42 thoughts on “Why is my daughter so annoyed with me?

  1. It depends on the situation. Sometimes I do stupid things that annoy my daughter, and sometimes growing up is hard and you take it out on those closest to you.which sort of answers your second question….I know when I’m stressed I’m quicker tone angry at those closest to me…

  2. I don’t think parents deserve it, but we understand that life is so stressful these days and for them venting out on one’s who will understand is easier. Hugs. Been there many times 🥰

  3. I agree with LA. The angst can be situational. My kids (which always feels and sounds weird to use that word since they are all in their 30’s) know who they are now and I think it’s different to have discussions or share POV when they are established, stable adults versus the teens and early 20’s. We also have very similar viewpoints and ways of living life so annoyances are rare even though they still occur from time to time. I am now however the mom who will confront the issue head on. We no longer avoid things now that their dad is out of the picture. They know we may disagree but that we can still respect and love each other.

  4. Your second question, about it being easier to strike out at those closest…yes. I’ve always struggled with it, but I remind myself it’s because I’m probably the safest target when times are tough. I know not everything is aimed at me, but I can be a pretty good outlet and let the crapola bounce off and be ready to hug anyway. That doesn’t mean it’s easy. I know that, too. You all are going through a lot. Sending love, love, love. 💕💕💕

  5. This too shall pass! It’s taken me a long time to understand this phrase and to have the needed patience, but it’s one of my favorite phrases now. It’s so true. I think in time we all get wiser and smarter. Like you, I said things to my mom that I regret and she couldn’t even remember them anymore.

  6. Yes, “this too shall pass!” its hard, but we do have to remind ourselves of that. And as for your last question, a BIG YES! The ones closest to us feel safe with us and if they feel safe with us then yes, we become the ones that they can take out their hurt and frustration on. Sorry that you are dealing with this now, for it is hard, when we think of how they idolized us when they were little. Mommy knew everything! LOL!

  7. Kids, just like adults, go through phases. Usually, I found this mean they have a lot of burdens in their own lives and they don’t know how to deal with them, so they take it out on “good old Mom.”

  8. I had a lot of conflicts with my mom almost all my growing up years. Maybe part of the reason I didn’t have children, in fact. Certainly we find it easier to be snippy with loved ones, people we’re around a lot and tend to find most annoying because of it.

  9. Oh, this is so good, Elizabeth. I think we do take it out on those closest to us. We think it’ll help us irrigate that irritation and when it doesn’t, it’s even more annoying, right? Sorry for the stressful times for you all – sending love!

  10. Been there too, and I think it’s normal for kids to take their frustration out on those they love. Parents just can’t take their actions or words too seriously, but it’s not always easy. My hubby and I are so grateful to have close relationships with our daughter (32) and our son (28). We don’t always agree, but how could we? We’re family, but we’re all individuals. 🙂

  11. As a childfree woman I haven’t had the experience of a daughter being annoyed with me, BUT as a daughter I remember being annoyed with my mother. I’d say it’s all growing pains, and a learning experience, and a way to know when you’ve finally grown up maybe.

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