My BFF from the University of Washington and me during one of her visits to our home.
Without my friends I would have been lost.
I’m talking about my recent visit with my mom. In case you missed it, I wrote about it HERE. It was difficult to find my mom in skilled nursing and to see how drastically she’s aged since my last visit.
I stayed with my best friend from college who lives six miles from my mom’s assisted living. Lots of times I stay in a small hotel close by. It’s not that nice, but affordable. It was so much better to come back each day to my friends’ comfy house and not be alone.
My BFF’s husband loves to cook and he shopped and prepared my favorite foods. The first night he made steamed clams, garlic bread and a delicious salad. Last time I visited, we went to Pike Place Market and I bought clams, which he cooked. They remembered how much I enjoyed them which was touching. I suppose they didn’t forget after I kept asking if they wanted the clams on their plates! They surrendered them to me.
It was so comforting to not stay by myself and to be able to relax and talk with close friends each day and tell them about my mom. I don’t know what I would have done without them.
The power of music.
One day my mom was kind of out of it. When I walked into her room, she was asleep. She woke up and said “Who are you and what do you want?” I was standing over her bed. To be fair, she didn’t have her glasses on and was groggy.
I got her out of bed and helped her sit in a chair while I sat on her walker. I turned on the TV, but she wasn’t interested and stared down at her hands.
I remembered my brother told me that she perked up listening to music. Mom was a coloratura soprano opera singer. My brother played her Joan Sutherland, a famous coloratura soprano, on his phone and he said Mom sang along with her. I played her favorite songs from Don McClean including Vincent, American Pie, And I Love You So, and Castles in the Air on my phone. She owned every one of McClean’s albums and played them over and over when I was a child.
After a few minutes of listening, my mom began to sing along. The music moved her and made her more alert. She focused on getting out of her chair to walk to her old room. I was amazed at the power of music and the effect it had on her.
“And I Love You So”
And I love you so The people ask me how How I’ve lived till now I tell them “I don’t know”
I guess they understand How lonely life has been But life began again The day you took my hand
And yes I know how lonely life can be The shadows follow me And the night won’t set me free But I don’t let the evening get me down Now that you’re around me
And you love me too Your thoughts are just for me You set my spirit free I’m happy that you do
The book of life is brief And once a page is read All but love is dead This is my belief
And yes I know how loveless life can be The shadows follow me And the night won’t set me free But I don’t let the evening bring me down Now that you’re around me
And I love you so The people ask me how How I’ve lived till now I tell them “I don’t know”
One of my mom’s all time favorite artists and songs.
What are your thoughts about the power of friendships and the power of music? Do you have any examples of how they’ve added to your life?
Here it is crab, Shrimp, Lobster (in Key West), Grouper, Snapper and Scallops. We can get it right off the boat, but many of the restaurants do as well, straight to the kitchen, straight to the plate.
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I am so jealous! You’re also able to election results in one day!
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The better question is, why cannot ALL states see them in a day? I have a good idea, but that would get me labeled as a conspiracy theorist, homophobic, Islamophobic, “climate denier”, and a racist.
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😂
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The food looks great and music is honestly so powerful. It brings people together and helps us create memories.
Both are extremely important. The other day I texted my 3 besties just to rant. We also had a full day text exchange about staplers. I need both types on conversations in my life
I can’t think of anything more important than our relationships! I’m sorry your mom is not doing well. It’s so difficult to watch our parents struggle with their health. It’s interesting that music was able to bring her some joy! I have such great memories of our dear friends singing along with the Eagles in our backyard, sipping wine and enjoying each other. The memories are so intertwined. Hugs, C
Thank you for your sympathy and kind thoughts for what I’m experiencing with my mom. My college friendships saved me. They are friends I don’t see for years and pick up without missing a beat. Music was mom’s career and passion as a coloratura soprano. I asked the skilled nursing staff to play her music, but I doubt they follow up. I think more visits from me are needed.
It was wonderful for too stay with your friend as compared to being on your own. Music is definitely a big motivator.
It helped so much to be with my friends. I was surprised at how music helped my mom.
That is really great.
👍🏼
💖
My Mom being Italian always played opera at home. She still likes to go to the opera. How wonderful that your mother could sing. A special gift.
I think listening to opera as a young child was a gift too. My mom had a beautiful voice.
Living in Arizona, I have to imagine you might miss fresh seafood. By fresh I mean sea to plate in 45 minutes.
I do miss it. Growing up in WA, we had a boat and we’d catch Dungeness crab that mom would cook within 15 minutes, plus salmon, clams and rockfish.
Here it is crab, Shrimp, Lobster (in Key West), Grouper, Snapper and Scallops. We can get it right off the boat, but many of the restaurants do as well, straight to the kitchen, straight to the plate.
I am so jealous! You’re also able to election results in one day!
The better question is, why cannot ALL states see them in a day? I have a good idea, but that would get me labeled as a conspiracy theorist, homophobic, Islamophobic, “climate denier”, and a racist.
😂
The food looks great and music is honestly so powerful. It brings people together and helps us create memories.
Both are extremely important. The other day I texted my 3 besties just to rant. We also had a full day text exchange about staplers. I need both types on conversations in my life
We do need our friends. Life would be empty without them.
👍👍
😎
I can’t think of anything more important than our relationships! I’m sorry your mom is not doing well. It’s so difficult to watch our parents struggle with their health. It’s interesting that music was able to bring her some joy! I have such great memories of our dear friends singing along with the Eagles in our backyard, sipping wine and enjoying each other. The memories are so intertwined. Hugs, C
Thank you for your sympathy and kind thoughts for what I’m experiencing with my mom. My college friendships saved me. They are friends I don’t see for years and pick up without missing a beat. Music was mom’s career and passion as a coloratura soprano. I asked the skilled nursing staff to play her music, but I doubt they follow up. I think more visits from me are needed.